


That Night in New York

by Angelsgirl17



Category: Carmilla (Web Series), Carmilla - All Media Types, Carmilla - J. Sheridan Le Fanu
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-13
Updated: 2016-05-29
Packaged: 2018-06-08 05:24:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 30,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6840652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelsgirl17/pseuds/Angelsgirl17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carmilla and Laura meet while on Business in New York and after a one night stand everything quite doesn't go as planned</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Lets see how this goes. I don't live in New York so any representations may be wrong

That night in New York

CARMILLA AND LAURA MEET WHILST ON BUSINESS TRIPS IN NEW YORK AND HAVE A ONE NIGHT STAND. ONE YEAR LATER THEY MEET AGAIN, BUT NEITHER OF THEM COULD HAVE PREDICTED IT WOULD BE IN SUCH CIRCUMSTANCES. 

PART ONE

It was a gorgeous summer’s evening, and 27 year old Laura Hollis would have loved to have been able to take a breath and soak up the ambience that such a place like New York provided. It was her third day in the city and she still hadn’t had time to get a feel for the place. It wasn’t a trip for pleasure, it was purely business, though, she had wished to at least see some of the beautiful sights. She was in her third day there, and was currently walking down 3rd Avenue on the phone with her witling boss. 

“Perry I told already told you,” Laura said in slight frustration, “everything went fine. All the papers are signed and sealed, I just have some loose ends to tie up tomorrow and then it’s all done.” Laura listened into her mobile for a few moments before stopping outside what looked to be a trendy little bar. She peeked through the half shut blinds and saw the soft light emanating from within. “Perry, I’m about to get on the Subway, I’ll have to call you back,” she fibbed, before switching off her phone and putting it away in her bag. Laura thought the world of her boss Perry, but her employer could sure be a stress head at times. With that final thought, Laura entered and took a seat at the bar. 

It didn’t take that long, not that it ever did, before a handsome man decided to try his luck. She had only just had her drink set down in front of her when she was approached by the tall dark stranger. 

“Hey little hottie, I’ve not been able to take my eyes off you since you walked in,” he said in a smooth voice, as he leant against the bar. “May I buy you another one?”

Laura licked her lips, put her hands in her lap, and met the stranger’s eyes. “No, thank you,” she replied politely. “But please do feel free to go back over to where you came from, and continue to admire me from a far.”

The cheesy grin that had been on the man’s face disappeared instantly at her remark, and with a clearing of the throat, he scurried off in embarrassment. Laura didn’t wish to be cruel, but she always thought that the direct approach was always best, especially when getting hit on by people she had absolutely no interest in. She breathed out in relief that her admirer had took the hint and vanished, and reached onto the bar to take the drink that had been placed in front of her into her hand. She was about to take a sip when a soft chuckling from the side of her made her turn her head in curiosity. No more than a metre away from her, sat a very attractive dark haired woman, a very attractive woman that seemed to be laughing in her direction. The woman was too sat at the bar with a cocktail, whilst idly twiddling a toothpick around in her drink, an olive still attached to it. Laura looked at her questionably, which made the woman’s laughing subside some as she felt the blonde’s eyes on her. 

“I’m sorry,” the woman said, still chucking a little, “It’s just that I’ve never seen anyone so adequately dismissed in such impeccable timing. That was sheer exquisite to watch, and funny I might add.” 

Laura was about to smile at the comment, but was halted instantaneously when the woman finally turned her head, and her gaze landed on the woman before her. The blonde would swear that the imminent spark was visible. Laura never thought that she’d ever be rendered speechless simply by seeing someone for the first time, and she didn’t believe anyone had the ability to make you go weak at the knees for that matter. She of course understood the sentiments of such sayings; it was like when people said that they’d be happy to be living in a cardboard box as long as they got to be with the one that they loved. It was complete bullshit, but the emotion behind it was sweet. She wasn’t so sure about her belief of such things anymore. If she wasn’t sitting down right then, her legs would have gone to jelly and the moment could have been terribly embarrassing. The person to the side of her had not only made her body tremble, but they had also made her breathing double. This had never happened to her before and she never expected it to either, but boy did it feel good. 

Laura knew that she had better say something soon for fear of looking like an idiot. She eventually managed to pick her tongue up off of the floor, and smile. “I’m Laura,” she introduced herself shyly.

“Carmilla,” the woman identified herself, before popping the toothpick into her mouth and sliding the olive off from the end using her teeth. 

Laura’s mouth started to water, who knew such an innocent action could be so erotic? “Nice to meet you,” she managed, all the while being entranced by Carmilla's lips, and an impeccable jawline.

Carmilla gazed at the blonde and grinned cheekily, she couldn’t remember the last time she had seen someone as gorgeous as the goddess right next to her. “So er, that guy not your type then?” she asked brazenly.

“Not exactly,” Laura blushed.

“I know what it is,” Carmilla clasped her hands together. “You don’t dig guys chatting you up in New York.”

“Not quite,” Laura giggled, “just…not my type.”

Carmilla looked thoughtful. “What if he was the last man on earth?”

“Then he still wouldn’t be…my type,” Laura elaborated. 

Carmilla finally clicked on and grinned. “You know, that is rather an interesting coincidence.”

“Yeah?” Laura's breathing intensified. “How so?”

Carmilla edged her chair closer to Laura's and scooted her drink along the bar next to the blonde’s. Looking deeply into the brown eyes that had her almost hypnotized, Carmilla smirked almost devilishly, “I haven’t had a heterosexual thought since I was fifteen.”

Laura simply smiled.

A couple of hours later and they were chatting vigorously about anything and everything, the drinks still flowing causing them both to be a little tipsy, but they were still in control of themselves. 

Carmilla took another big swig of her drink and took a deep breath. “Okay. Sixteen, Paige Knight, on her parent’s sofa.”

Laura’s eyes widened as she learned the age that Carmilla had lost her innocence, and looked a little uncomfortable all of a sudden. “Erm…Danny Lawrence, in our bed.”

“Age?” Carmilla prodded.

“Twenty Three,” Laura replied quietly.

“Yeah right,” Carmilla laughed, but soon stopped when Laura remained silent. Carmilla scrunched her face up in confusion. “How is that possible I mean, have you not seen you?”

“I wasn’t ready for it until then, that’s all,” Laura told her in a small voice. 

“You know, sex doesn’t always have to mean something all the time,” Carmilla commented boldly. “I mean it is allowed to be fun.”

“It has to mean something to me,” Laura said softly.

“Wow,” Carmilla stated in comical awe. “What does that feel like?”

Laura just laughed and shook her head; Carmilla was obviously one for no strings sex. “I take it you're not a relationship kind of girl then?”

“Was,” Carmilla said much to Laura's surprise, “Once, that is.”

“Really?” Laura asked intrigued.

“Elsie was…cool,” Carmilla mused, remembering the only real girlfriend she ever had. “She was a lot of fun, hot in the sack and never boring. We went out for over a year and everything was great.”

“But?” Laura asked confused.

“Then she had to go and do it,” Carmilla said in dismay.

“Do what?”

“Bring up the ‘M’ word,” Carmilla replied.

“She wanted to marry you?”

“Yep,” Carmilla nodded, “So you know naturally, I ran as fast I my feet would carry me.”

“You don’t do commitment then?” Laura asked, though it was more of a statement than anything else. 

“Haven’t got the time for it to be honest,” Carmilla explained. “My job takes up most of my time so even if I wanted to be in a relationship, I’m sure it’d be a strained one at that.”

“Don’t you think that’s a bit presumptuous?” Laura enquired gently. “I mean your ideal woman could be out there right now just waiting for you to go in and sweep her off of her feet.”

Carmilla snorted but grinned. “My ideal woman would be happy to see me a couple of days a week, not moan about there not being enough romance, and would fear the ‘M’ word as much as me.”

“So your idea relationship would be with yourself then?” Laura joked.

“Exactly,” Carmilla grinned, and then finished her drink.

“Are you really that afraid of marriage?” Laura questioned in disbelief. The blonde wanted that for herself more than anything in the world, to find someone who would love her for the rest of her life, and here was someone who couldn’t bear the thought of it.

“Well my parents didn’t make it look like much fun,” Carmilla told her, flashes of her step mother and father’s arguments making her shudder.

“Just because your parent’s made mistakes doesn’t mean that you’ll make the same ones,” Laura offered kindly. Carmilla just shrugged, obviously not comfortable talking about that particular subject. “Did you love her?” Laura asked, referring to Elsie.

“I don’t know,” Carmilla answered truthfully. “I don’t think I’ve ever really been in love. You?”

“I thought I was but, I guess everyone does at the time right?” Laura replied guardedly.

Carmilla realised there and then that they were two completely different people. 

Laura undoubtedly was one of those girls who cherished relationships, whereas Carmilla liked to play the field, have fun and enjoy her freedom. Still, that wasn’t about to stop her from trying to convince the blonde into spending the night with her. She couldn’t remember being so attracted to someone before, and she had to see if Laura felt and tasted as good as she looked. Carmilla grinned inwardly, she had one of the most adventure cities in the world at her advantage, and no matter how much Laura appeared to frown at one night stands, the brunette was sure that she could convince her that this was meant to be. Laura came across as a lovely, decent woman, one that certainly had morals and self-respect, and Carmilla admired her for that. But Laura wasn’t able to conceal a particular look that Carmilla always loved seeing on women’s faces, especially when it was aimed at her. It was the ‘I really need to be fucked hard by someone’ look, and it was Carmilla's all time favourite.

“You know it’s really nice out,” Carmilla said leaning in closer to her, “do you fancy going for a walk?”

“Did you want to leave now?” Laura asked with a shy grin.

Carmilla slowly gave a sexy smile, and then looked around for the bartender. “Bill please!”

After leaving the bistro, Carmilla and Laura made the short walk to Central Park. Walking along the footpath, Laura asked a completely innocent question, only afterwards it made her cheeks flush scarlet. “So which hotel are you staying at?”

Carmilla raised her eyebrows teasingly. “Four Seasons.”

Laura stopped in her tracks. “Four Seasons!? Your boss actually put you up in The Four Season?”

“She knows it’s worth her while,” Carmilla answered smugly, before going in for the kill. “My room’s got a huge bed too.”

Laura almost gasped, she never found conceited women attractive, she always found it very off putting, but for some reason that she’d never be able to figure out; she was now actually finding it a turn on. She felt it had to be New York, but then she thought no, it had to do with the dark haired girl standing in front of her. 

“Are you really that good at your job?” Laura asked playfully, doing everything she could think of to get off the subject of beds and bedrooms.

Carmilla got closer to her. “I’m good at most things,” she told her boldly. 

Laura's voice hitched in her throat, she had never met a woman who was so forward before. “What are you like the female version of James Bond or something?”

“Well I could tell you but then I’d have to kill you,” Carmilla said, in an almost arrogant tone.

“What is it exactly that you do?” Laura pressed, “You never told me. Not even after I told you about my illustrious career as a journalist.”

For the first time that night, Carmilla showed a small glimpse of what looked to be a bit of embarrassment. Even though Laura appeared to be making fun out of her job, Carmilla could tell by the way the blonde had spoken about it earlier, that her job meant the world to her. It was refreshing to see, especially when Carmilla spent most of her time around women who took their careers for granted, women who genuinely believed that it was their right, when in all actuality, it was a privilege. 

Laura tapped Carmilla's arm playfully. “Come on, tell me.”

Carmilla looked to the heavens before meeting the blonde’s inquisitive eyes. “I’m a Partner in a Law firm’.”

The smile slowly disappeared from Laura’s face, as she realised that Carmilla was being totally serious. “Wow,” she whispered in complete awe. “I mean that’s like…so much better than secret agent stuff.”

Carmilla managed to smile modestly for once.

“That’s like so awesome,” Laura added still in awe. “I guess it’s no wonder you’re so busy all the time.”

“Well you know, it has its advantages,” Carmilla shrugged. 

Laura smiled and nodded knowingly. “Loads of hot women right?”

“Something like that,” Carmilla said quietly, her eyes not once breaking from Laura's.

Laura could no longer take the penetrating gaze, and looked at her watch. “It’s getting late.”

“Yeh,” Carmilla agreed, but still couldn’t take her eyes away from the vision in her line of view.

“When do you leave?” Laura asked, her heart tensing up in anticipation of the answer.

“My flight’s tomorrow morning at 10.00,” Carmilla replied almost sadly.

“Oh,” Laura pouted, she was bitterly disappointed. “I guess you’ll need to get back to your hotel soon then?”

“Mmm,” was all Carmilla could manage.

Laura wrung her hands together as she desperately thought of what to say next. “Well…I suppose I should be going--“

“Laura,” Carmilla cut her off gently.

“Yeah?”

Carmilla licked her lips. “Can I ask you something?”

“Course,” the blonde replied. 

“Spend the night with me.”

Laura’s mouth bobbed up and down for a few moments, not quite believing what she’d just heard. “That wasn’t a question.”

“No I guess not,” Carmilla said, feeling nervous for some reason. It wasn’t like she had never had a one night stand before, but there was something about this girl that was totally different from the others. “Will you please consider…spending the night with me?”

Laura’s mouth had suddenly gone dry, was this really happening to her? “I don’t…usually, do that sort of thing.”

“You never do that sort of thing,” Carmilla said knowingly, Laura was obviously not one for casual sex.

“I don’t,” Laura confirmed.

“First time for everything though right?” Carmilla encouraged.

“Why me?”

Carmilla thought carefully how to word was going on in her head, before trying to put it into words. “Because I think that, you are quite possibly the most stunningly beautiful woman that I’ve ever laid eyes on. And all I want right now… is to take you back to my hotel room and make love to you for the rest of the night, or until I’ve got not a single breath left in my body.”

Laura’s body slowly began to melt, and all of her defences that she put up over the past couple of years were being knocked down. She had no idea what came over her, she never acted this way ever, and she had never met anyone who had made her feel this way either, not even when she was in a relationship. Not that she had been in a relationship for a while. Her last one had ended quite badly a couple of years ago and she hadn’t been in one since, and it had been even longer since she’d actually been intimate with someone. Laura didn’t take matters of the heart lightly, and she didn’t take sex lightly either, she had only ever had two sexual partners and had been in relationships with both of them. Unfortunately, both of her ex-girlfriends had been wrong for her. The first one she’ll admit, that they had outgrew each other, whilst the second one simply broke her heart. She wasn’t sure that she even wanted a relationship right now, so why shouldn’t she live dangerously for once? There was a gorgeous woman in front of her who was begging the blonde to let her worship her. Was there really anything to think about for once? With that, Laura’s mind was made up.

She looked up into the dark eyes that’s she’d gotten lost in on more than one occasion that night, and smiled shyly. “Ok.”

Carmilla bit her lip in an attempt to keep the elation inside of her from bursting out. She gently took Laura's hand into hers, the instant spark causing tingles to shoot through her body at their initial touch, and led her to the side of the road where they managed to hail a taxi within minutes.

Fifteen minutes later and they arrived at the hotel. Carmilla had one of the superior rooms on one of the upper floors, it wasn’t exactly the penthouse, but it wasn’t far off. She inserted the card key in the lock, opened the door, and leisurely led Laura inside. 

As soon as the door was closed, both girls stood still and looked at each other in anticipation, though only one was showing signs of nerves. Carmilla did this kind of thing quite regularly, whereas Laura had never done it before in her life. Obviously the blonde was going to be anxious, but if anything, Carmilla only found it more endearing. In that single moment, Carmilla just wanted to wrap her arms around Laura and protect her from everything bad in the world, but she had to face facts. This was one night, with no strings. She couldn’t be seen to be too emotionally involved.

Laura took a deep breath. “I don’t usually do this kind of thing.”

Carmilla grinned. “Yeah I know, you’ve told me like a hundred times.”

“Sorry,” Laura looked down feeling embarrassed.

Carmilla took a step closer to her. “Laura,” she started gently. “I’m not gonna hurt you.”

“I know that,” Laura accepted truthfully.

Carmilla slowly let her hands come up to rest on Laura's waist. “Just try to relax, and enjoy it.” With that, the Carmilla finally closed the gap between them, and placed her lips on to Laura's.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is not suitable for anyone under 18!  
> Mature Content

She never did this. She never thought she would. Yet here she was, abandoning a belief that she had held for so long, by getting completely lost in the arms of someone who she’d only met that night.

Laura was never one to judge, she believed that people had every right to make up their own minds when it came to going to bed with someone, and she’d never try and force her opinion on anybody, but she just didn’t believe in this. 

She felt one night stands were sleazy, and that they totally made a mockery of what she held sex to be in her heart. 

To her, sex was supposed to be between two people who loved each other, who would use it as way to connect to the other both physically and emotionally, not just an avenue to go down in order to release pent up frustration. 

Laura was always adamant that she would never give herself to just anybody, that she had to feel a special connection with someone before she could even think of getting intimate with them. It was a sentiment that her best friend Elle admired her for, but always thought she was nuts for too. 

Elle was also her roommate, she had moved in with her after her last relationship had broken down and they both got on like a house on fire. 

Elle was gay too and they had so much in common with each other, even though her attitudes towards sex were totally different from Laura’s. 

Elle believed that meaningless sex could be fun and she was only too happy to indulge in such flings from time to time. Laura never berated her for it though, in fact, she found the conversations they shared about Elle’s conquests to be quite amusing. 

Laura just hoped that when she returned to Ottawa a hypocrite, that her friend wasn’t too proud of her, as she was bound to find Laura's one night stand splendid news. 

Elle told her that she would one day meet someone that she just wouldn’t be able to resist, to which Laura snorted and muttered ‘as if’, she didn’t think there was anything that she could have been more wrong about.

Laura had her own idea about one night stands and how they worked, which is why she never saw herself ever wanting to have one. 

To her, a one night stand involved two people who were overcome with a rash need to engage in as raw, animalistic sex as possible. She had said as much to Elle one time, who simply grinned from ear to ear and replied, ‘what’s so wrong with that?’ 

But now, as she felt herself being gently eased down onto the softest sheets she’d ever felt, tender lips trailing the lightest of kisses down the hollow of her throat, Laura felt like crying at the beauty of it. 

There was nothing animalistic about how Carmilla was worshipping her right then, like she was made of glass and would easily break if she wasn’t handled correctly. 

She felt Carmilla's fingers slowly follow the trail that her lips had just taken, and her heart rate intensified when they came to rest on the buttons of her blouse. 

Carmilla started nuzzling her neck affectionately, planting tender kisses on every inch of skin that was open to her, the blonde’s scent making her drunk with desire. 

Her fingers finally started to wrestle with the buttons on Laura's blouse, desperately needing to feel more of the exquisiteness lying beneath her. Her hand finally made its way inside, only to be confronted with another barrier, this time in the form of a lace bra. 

As she firmly pulled the bra down exposing the blonde’s delicious chest, Carmilla heard Laura take a sharp intake of breath. 

She at last managed to tear her lips away from Laura’s neck, and made the short journey downwards. 

Carmilla leisurely kissed her way down to Laura’s breast’s, a small hand gently cupping her head encouragingly, when she stopped momentarily and looked up deeply into Laura’s eyes.

“You’re so beautiful cupcake,” Carmilla whispered, in complete awe of the vision beneath her.

Laura briefly closed her eyes, so overcome with raw emotion. She was finally finding out what it felt like to want someone who you’d just met, so badly. 

She opened her eyes and reached up to cup Carmilla’s face gently, smiling shyly before bring her lips down to hers. 

The kiss was slow, passionate and full of feeling, so much so that a moan escaped her as Carmilla continued to explore her mouth with her own. 

Laura had never been kissed like this before, never had it feel so good before, and she wanted to feel more. 

Luckily for her, Carmilla's hand had just started wandering again, and was soon massaging the Laura’s right breast softly. 

Laura was getting what she wanted and more, giggling into Carmilla’s mouth when she felt her nipple being pinched. 

Carmilla smiled into the kiss that had lasted so long she needed a breath, and pulled away. She pecked her lips a few more times, before not being able to resist any longer, she finally took Laura’s breast into her mouth and began sucking gently. 

Laura’s eyes closed in delight, quickly starting to get lost in the woman above her. She felt Carmilla reach down and raise one of her legs up from the bed. She bended it at the knee and waited in anticipation, as Carmilla's hand expertly crept underneath her skirt, not once taking her mouth from Laura’s nipple which was now hard as stone.

Laura breathed deeply and grinned as Carmilla's hand got higher between her thighs. Seconds later and she felt Carmilla’s lips and fingers stop moving. 

Carmilla lifted her head and looked at Laura with a raised brow. “Cupcake, Erm…you’re not wearing any underwear,” she observed in wonder.

Laura blushed. “I felt rather hot before I left my hotel this afternoon, so I thought, why not?”

Carmilla leaned down and hovered just above her lips. “That is so fucking hot,” she whispered, before crashing her lips to Laura's.

Laura wrapped her arms around Carmilla’s neck, and welcomed the deep kiss. 

The mood had changed slightly, and things were turning more urgent. 

Clothes were becoming a pain and both of them eagerly helped the other out when it came to making the lot disappear, they wanted to be able to feel, needed to be able to feel. 

It was soon skin against skin, and even though both were naked above the covers, Laura had never felt so hot. 

They had become totally consumed in one another, and throughout the night, no one would have been able to guess where one began and the other one ended. 

If one of them tried to move away, albeit for a breath, or even to get into a different position, they’d be pulled back into an embrace for fear that they might vanish. 

Their connection had become so powerful in fact, that it was beginning to feel unsettling for one of them in particular. 

She had never had such emotional feelings engulf her so strongly, especially for just one person, and it scared her half to death.

They had been at it for a few hours now, and Laura had never, ever, been made to feel so good before. 

Even when she was in a relationship with someone whom she thought she loved, they had never gave her the toe curling feelings that were being driven into her right at that moment. 

She leant up on her elbows and threw her head back as she tried in vain to compose herself. Her moans were coming thick and fast, showing no signs of easing at all, she just prayed that the walls were soundproof. 

She bit down on her lip as she felt Carmilla's tongue hit a wonderfully sensitive spot, but couldn’t keep her moan from escaping. 

Looking down between her legs and saw her lover’s head still nestled between them, Carmilla’s tongue darting in and out of her intimate heat, her moving fingers buried deep inside her. 

Laura wouldn’t remember the amount of times that Carmilla had gotten her off that night, but the tingling sensation that was now building down below forever gaining momentum, was going to prove the pinnacle of her night. 

Her breathing was becoming ragged and Carmilla showed no signs of stopping or slowing down, her legs were beginning to tense and instinctively close, but were being kept apart by her lover’s strong hold. 

She reached down and rested her hand on the back on Carmilla's head, hinting that she needed it harder and faster, astonished when Carmilla immediately gave what was silently asked for. 

Then it happened. Laura felt the unmistakable feeling of ecstasy that had been building up for the last half hour, and blissfully let go. 

She moaned like never before. It was loud, very loud, and completely necessary. 

The after effects of her release made her shudder for a few moments, and then she collapsed back onto the bed completely spent. 

Her hands immediately went to her forehead, as she tried not only to get her breath back, but comprehend just how good that experience had been for her. 

She soon felt light kisses in between her thighs, and then on her stomach, as Carmilla's mouth inched its way back up to her face. 

Carmilla leant up on her arms and smiled sexily as she took in the Laura’s dazed expression.

“Did you enjoy that creampuff?” she asked cockily.

“What do you think?” Laura grinned, and reached up to smooth Carmilla's cheek with her hand.

Carmilla looked pleased enough with the answer. She kissed her gently on the lips before dropping to the side of her, leaning up on one arm, and gazing into brown eyes. 

She then placed a hand on Laura’s stomach and began rubbing it affectionately. “You felt incredible,” she told her, desire still present in her voice.

“So did you,” Laura replied, reaching down and covering Carmilla’s hand with her own. “And that was the most intense orgasm I’ve ever had in my entire life.”

“And here I thought you were shy buttercup” Carmilla said playfully, feeling extremely pleased with herself. 

She had been told before by previous lovers that she was great in bed, but it never got tiring to hear how good you could make people feel.

 

“I don’t feel shy with you,” Laura admitted softly. 

Carmilla had made her feel so…alive and free during the night, and she never thought anyone could make her feel like that.

Carmilla licked her lips. “I’ve never had anyone come so hard for me before,” she commented huskily, “I actually though you were gonna pass out on me at one point.”

Laura blushed, it was true but still. “You’re always so sure of yourself aren’t you?

“I have to be cutie,” Carmilla said honestly. She was about to say more when she caught Laura looking at her in a way she couldn’t decipher. “What?”

“You really don’t let anyone in do you?” Laura asked softly. 

Carmilla's heart was in her throat. 

Laura had hit the nail on the head and Carmilla suddenly felt very uncomfortable at way the Laura was studying her, mainly because this woman was making her feel things that she swore she would never feel for anyone. 

Laura could tell something was wrong, and raised a hand to Carmilla's cheek. “I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Carmilla just smiled. She removed Laura's hand from her face and kissed it gently. “Relax cupcake, you didn’t,” she said, shrugging it off. 

Laura decided not to pursue it any further, and soon the two of them were nestled under the covers together. Carmilla was lying on her back staring at the ceiling looking worried about something, whilst Laura was resting across her chest feeling blissfully relaxed.

“Carm?”

“Mmm.”

Laura waited for a moment before finally finding the courage to ask what she wanted. “Can I see you again?” she asked softly.

Carmilla's eyes closed in slight pain. 

She hated this, why couldn’t it have been easy like the others? 

She couldn’t allow herself to feel anything for the woman in her arms, it wasn’t supposed to be this way, and she thought Laura understood that. She had been completely honest with her from the start and told her she didn’t do commitment.

Carmilla tried to smile bravely. “It doesn’t quite work like that cutie.”

Laura looked up at her and grinned. “I know I just…”

Carmilla smoothed Laura’s hair behind her ears. “Laura, later I’ll be getting on a flight back to Toronto, where my life is. And tomorrow, you’ll be getting on a flight back to Ottawa, where your life is.”

Laura looked down disappointed, she’d give anything to see Carmilla again, but unfortunately Carmila wasn’t all that keen on seeing her. 

“Yeah you’re right, stupid.” She settled back down onto Carmilla's chest, and willed herself to remember every last detail of how this felt, as she would never get the chance to be like this with her again. 

She closed her eyes and inhaled, totally oblivious to the look of sadness that was on Carmilla's face above her. 

Laura had completely turned her life upside down overnight, and it had scared her. Her heart was raising questions that she couldn’t deal with, and didn’t want to deal with. 

****

When Laura woke the next morning she instinctively reached out to the space beside her, only to find that it was empty. 

She sat up in bed holding the covers to her chest, and looked around the room. It looked barer than it had the night before. 

The suitcase and bags that had been in the corner were now gone, and some clothes that had been around the room were no longer there. 

The only thing that Laura noticed was a chair to the side, where her clothes had been neatly folded and placed. 

The room was deadly silent, and a feeling of dread welled up inside her. 

“Carm?” she called out, but as she expected got no reply. 

She glanced at the bedside table and noticed a folded note. Slowly she reached out for it, almost afraid to read what it said. 

She opened it up and saw that it was from Carmilla.

_Laura_

_Left early as I didn’t want to miss my flight. You were a lot of fun cupcake._

_Carmilla_

Laura wiped a tear away from her eye, and screwed the note up in disgust.

She couldn’t believe that Carmilla had just left her all alone like that, without even saying goodbye. Last night really had meant absolutely nothing to the brunette at all.

 

**ONE YEAR LATER**

 

Laura couldn’t help but smile as she watched Elle prepare for her date. They were both in the kitchen, Laura standing by the sink as Elle sat at the table painting her nails. 

Her roommate had been seeing someone for the past three months and was visibly besotted with her new lover.

“You know you still haven’t told me her name yet,” Laura whined.

“Well you know my rules, I don’t like tempting fate,” Elle explained. “Besides, you’ll know her name when you meet her.”

“Meet her?” Laura asked in surprised. “Is it really that serious?” 

“I think it is,” Elle replied dreamily.

“You’re actually going to bring her back here tonight?”

“Maybe,” Elle winked. “We’ve stayed at hers for the past few nights, what with her living alone and that. But tonight, we’ll probably come back here because it’s closer to the restaurant we’re going to.”

“More a la carte dining?” Laura giggled.

Elle smiled. “Jealous that my new girlfriends’ rich and loves to spoil me?”

“Erm yeah, of course,” Laura replied as though it was obvious.

“You’ll find someone babe,” Elle told her kindly. “You’ve got too much of a big heart not to.”

Laura wasn’t so sure, she had two failed relationships behind her, and a one night stand in New York that had destroyed all of her faith in love for a long time after it had happened. 

If she was honest, her heart was still sore after what Carmilla had done to her. 

She understood that Carmilla didn’t want a relationship, but did she really have to be so cruel and leave her the way she did that morning? 

It just seemed that everyone she dated or wanted to feel close to got some sort pf sick pleasure out of treating her like dirt, and she could never understand why.

She was bought out of her thoughts by a tap on the arm.

“I’ve got to go,” Elle told her. “Want me to bring you anything back?”

“I’m going be long in the land of nod by the time you get home, party girl,” Laura joked, but was appreciative of the gesture.

“Ok,” Elle smiled and kissed her cheek. “See you in the morning.”

“Have fun,” Laura smiled as she watched her friend gleefully head out, happy that at least one of them had someone special in their life. She would just have to wait that little bit longer for her ‘someone special’.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a year and Laura come face to face again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mature Content!

It was the early hours of the morning and Laura was having trouble sleeping. She’d had a couple of hours earlier that night, but was awoken by noises coming from the next room. 

It wasn’t as if she hadn’t heard her roommate have an orgasm before, in fact, she’d heard it quite a few times. The walls in their apartment were paper thin and unfortunately Laura had nowhere to hide when it came to Elle's lively sex life. 

But in the years that they’d shared the apartment, she had never known it to last so long before. 

She didn’t think that sex could last that long period. The only time Laura could remember an orgasm lasting that long, was the one that she’d been given in New York by Carmilla a year ago. 

Her mind wondered back and she blushed as she remembered that she too had been quite loud during that one night, when she had lost count of how many she’d had seeing as how she and Carmilla were at it for hours, so she knew it wasn’t impossible after to go all night. 

Whoever was in the next room with her friend was sure giving it to her good, just as Carmilla had given it her. 

Laura lay on her back and continued in vain to get some sleep, eventually giving up. In the end she had no choice but to wait until her friend and new lover were done. 

Sometime later and a loud thud on the wall behind her combined with a strident scream of ecstasy from Elle made her jump out of her skin. 

She heard a few more pants and moans from both women in the next room, followed by some childish giggling, and was relieved to know that it was over. 

Laura finally relaxed into her pillows, and smiled in bliss at last being able to get some sleep. Though, it didn’t last for long. 

Half an hour later and moaning could be heard once again. Laura groaned in utter frustration, and pulled a pillow over her head in a last ditch effort to get some peace. It didn’t work.

xoxoxo

The next morning and Laura was looking worse for wear. She had hardly got a wink of sleep the night before and was now sitting at the kitchen table with her first cup of coffee looking like a zombie. 

It wasn’t long before Elle entered looking fresh as a daisy.

“Morning Laur,” Elle greeted happily as she walked over to the kettle, while Laura just looked at her in disbelief.

“How are you not tired?” the blonde asked in wonder.

“Are you kidding?” Elle smiled. “After the night I had?”

“Uh yeah?” Laura said as if it was obvious.

Elle made herself a drink and sat down at the table with her friend. “I’ve never felt so alive,” she said giggling. “I had my brains completely, and utterly fucked out last night.”

“Yeah I know,” Laura grinned, “I sleep in the next room remember?”

“Oh” Elle looked genuinely apologetic, “I am so sorry.”

“When have I ever berated you for getting some?” Laura joked. The fact that she never did didn’t mean she wasn’t happy for her friend when she got it.

Elle cocked her head to the side. “You really are a trooper do you know that?”

“Course,” Laura said smugly. “So let’s hear it.”

Elle took a deep breath. “I think I’m in love.”

“Oh right,” Laura said deadpanned, it wasn’t like she’d never heard that before.

“No, no, I’m being serious this time,” Elle assured her. 

“Elle, you’ve only been going out a few of months,” Laura pointed out.

“Yeah I know but this is different Laura, I can just feel it,” Elle said confidently, a dreamy look adorning her flawless features. “This one is…so hot, smart, and successful. She makes me feel like I could take on the world you know?”

Laura did know. She had been made to feel like that in one single night during her time in New York, by someone who completely tore her heart out by leaving her all alone, after giving her the best night of her life. 

Elle wasn’t finished and bought Laura out of her memories by adding, “And she is like the best sex that I have ever, ever had.”

Laura rolled her eyes. “Sex isn’t love.”

“No but it’s a nice bonus right?” Elle giggled. 

She knew that Laura was a romantic at heart and wanted the fairytale, but she did enjoy teasing. “I want you to meet her.”

Laura looked at her state of dress, doctor who pyjamas and a robe. “What now?”

“Yeah you look fine.”

“Oh I don’t know,” Laura said sceptically.

“Oh come on there’s no reason to be shy,” Elle told her as she stood up. “Plus it’s been three months and you still haven’t met yet.”

“Well yeah, but I have been busy,” Laura defended; her job did take up a lot of her time.

Elle heard footsteps from the hall and saw her new squeeze approaching. “Oh babe in here,” she gestured with her hand. “I want you to meet my roommate, come on.” 

Elle's girlfriend finally entered the kitchen and froze on the spot, whilst Laura’s eyes widened in horror. 

Miraculously, both were able to gain some composure before Elle was able to pick up on the immediate tension between them.

“Laura this is Carmilla, Carmilla this is Laura,” Elle happily introduced them to each other; blissfully unaware that it was quite unnecessary. 

Elle gauged their reactions and after a while started giggling. Throwing her arms around Carmilla's neck she looked up into her lover’s eyes. 

“Ok, Laura always looks at my girlfriend’s like that, but what is it with you? You’re not shy,” she said playfully, delicately running her fingers down Carmilla's cheek, something that made Laura who was watching very intently, feel quite queasy. 

Elle then squeezed Carmilla's nose affectionately, “You look so cute when you’ve just woken up,” she said sweetly.

This statement hit Laura particularly hard, for she had never got to see what Carmilla looked like when she first woke. By the time Laura had woken up in Carmilla's hotel bed that fateful morning, Carmilla was already at JFK airport checking in for her plane back to Canada. 

Laura felt her heart breaking in two, not that it had fully repaired to begin with. She had fought so hard to forget about what had happened in New York, and now she was confronted with the whole thing once again, or should she say, the person that had caused her so many sleepless nights. 

She watched in misery as Elle planted her lips on to Carmilla's, to give her a long searing kiss, a kiss that Carmilla accepted without much of a fight.

Elle finally pulled away from her girlfriend and stroked her face delicately. “I’m going to take a shower; I sure need one after that workout you gave me last night.” 

Laura had no idea where to put her face, and was horrified by Elle's next words, “why don’t you two get to know each other a little better, I won’t be long.” 

Elle practically skipped out of the kitchen leaving Carmilla and Laura alone, completely oblivious to the unbearable tension that she had left behind her.

Laura would never be able to remember a time when anger irrupted within her so quickly, especially when she was convinced that a little smirk was beginning to form on Carmilla's face. 

Laura’s eyes narrowed into slits as she watched the woman who had made her scream in elation many times during that night in New York, peek gingerly into the corridor to presumably make sure that Elle was out of ear shot, before having the guts to open her mouth.

Carmilla looked Laura up and down. “So this is what you look like in the morning cupcake.”

Laura couldn’t believe what she was hearing, and she couldn’t believe that Carmilla actually had the audacity to say that to her.

“Is that supposed to be funny?” Laura asked in revulsion.

Carmilla picked up on the edge in Laura’s tone, and thought that maybe this was not the time or place to try and be cute. 

“No,” she replied truthfully, “I just thought I’d try breaking the tension.”

“Try harder,” Laura challenged dangerously. 

Carmilla cleared her throat nervously; she had couldn’t remember the last time she had felt so uneasy in a situation. “I bet you thought you’d never see me again,” she said softly. 

Laura folded her arms defensively. “Hoped’ is a better word,” she corrected in a poisonous tone. If looks could kill, Carmilla would have been a goner. 

“Laura, I don’t know what to say,” Carmilla admitted quietly.

“This coming from someone who uses words to literally charm the pants off of women,” Laura snorted. “I find that very hard to believe.” 

Carmilla desperately wanted to remind Laura that she didn’t have to charm the pants off of her that night, seeing as she wasn’t wearing any, something that made Carmilla hot with need even to this day. She eventually thought against it, and instead did something that she had wanted to do for the past year, but never thought she’d ever get the opportunity.

“Look, I’m sorry for the way I left you that morning cupcake,” she spoke earnestly. “It was wrong of me.”

Laura’s mood softened at her words, but went back to being icy when she remembered that being a fool never got her anywhere. People walking over her was a thing of the past, and she would be damned if she was going to let someone who had basically ruined her year make a fool of her yet again, even if she did sound sincere. 

“Fine, whatever,” she said trying to sound disinterested, though deep down inside all she could think of was what it felt like to be in the comfort of Carmilla's arms. 

She felt weak at the knees again, Carmilla was as gorgeous as ever, but Laura knew she had to remain focused. 

This was now her best friend’s girlfriend, a fact that was making her heart crumble, and the realisation that Carmilla was the one causing Elle to make all that noise last night, was making her feel sick. 

“Laura…”

“So do you want to tell her, or should I?”

Carmilla licked her lips and chuckled anxiously. “Tell her what?”

“About us,” Laura replied evenly.

“Sundance, there is no ‘us’,” Carmilla pointed out gently. 

“Ok fine let me re-phrase that,” Laura said quickly, “is it going to be me, or you that tells her about what happened between us in New York?”

“What good would that do?”

“it’s call honesty,” Laura said hotly, “something that you’re brutal with.”

Carmilla shook her head. “Sweetheart this has got nothing to do with being honest with Elle, you just want to get back at me because of what I did to you.”

“That’s not true,” Laura fibbed; it was part of the reason. The other part was that she couldn’t bear keeping something so big from her best friend. 

Carmilla took a few steps closer to her, which made Laura take a step back in what could only be described as fear. The look on her face made Carmilla feel pain like never before, was Laura actually scared of her?

Carmilla looked deeply into Laura's eyes and hated what she saw. 

There wasn’t an ounce of the desire and excitement that was there when they first met, for it had been replaced with sadness and regret. 

“I hurt you, I know that,” Carmilla croaked, “but I can’t change what I did. And the only thing that you’ll achieve by telling Elle about us is an upset roommate. ”

“But it’ll mean that I never have to see you again,” Laura commented.

Carmilla was stunned, she knew she had hurt her but she never could have predicted that Laura would hate her so much. She detested herself for causing the blonde pain, and seeing her again bought every feeling that she’d felt for this woman in New York back full force, but she was so confused right now. 

She left Laura because she was scared of what she felt that night. They hardly knew each other, but Carmilla could feel herself falling in love with Laura every second she was with her. And now the counter had begun again. 

She had no idea what do with such feelings but it was irrelevant, she knew Laura deserved better than anything that she could ever give her, which is why she left the way she did that morning. 

She had to stay away from Laura, for fear of causing her anymore unnecessary pain. 

Time would tell whether that plan would work. She had to try and get on with her life instead of pining away for the cute journalist, something that was now going to be harder than ever before, and she really did like Elle, so she had to take the opportunity to finally move on.

Carmilla licked her lips. “Cupcake, I like Elle a lot, and I really want to make a go of things with her. So can we please, just forget about what happened in New York? It was over a year ago and it didn’t…”

“Mean anything?” Laura offered quietly. “I know that.” 

Carmilla swallowed the lump in her throat and remained silent, as Laura felt her eyes start to moisten. The blonde’s heart was being crushed more and more by the minute, she couldn’t help but think why Elle was good enough, but she wasn’t? “I won’t say anything,” she finally told the brunette, clearly upset.

“I wish things could have been different,” Carmilla said, her heart in her throat. “I really do.”

Laura just shrugged her shoulders in defeat. “I do too,” she sniffed, briefly looking to the floor before resolutely meeting Carmilla’s eyes. “I wish that I had never met you,” she said with a slight edge, a u-turn that made Carmilla’s heart constrict in pain. “I wish that I had never got into that taxi with you, and I wish that I had never gone to your hotel room that night.” 

Laura paused for a moment before continuing; not taking any notice of the agony her little speech was causing the woman in front of her. “You know I probably would have felt less cheap when I woke up that morning, if you had just left some money by the bed.”

With that last piercing statement, Laura walked away leaving Carmilla completely broken.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had a great weekend thanks to all of your lovely comments and so here is the next chapter for you guys to enjoy!

The next couple of weeks were amongst some of the most surreal in her life, seeing Carmilla again had knocked her for six, but she stayed true to her word and didn’t tell Elle about her and Carmilla's night together. 

It wasn’t easy. 

Ever since she’d seen Carmilla again, certain feelings inside her that she had tried so hard to ignore over the past year had been reignited again, and it unsettled her deeply. 

Not only did she have to keep a huge secret from her best friend, she had to deal with the harsh reality that she was in fact, still head over heels for the woman who in a cruel twist of fate was now her roommate’s girlfriend. 

Laura couldn’t explain it, she and Carmilla hardly knew each other, but there was something between them. At least, there was for her. 

She had no idea how Carmilla felt, but the way that that Carmilla had seemingly brushed her off when they last seen each other again, meant that she probably didn’t feel the same. 

Luckily for her, she hadn’t seen much of Carmilla over the last fortnight. She rarely came to the apartment, only staying over a couple of times, and even when she did she didn’t see her, as Carmilla was already gone by the time she got up. Carmilla was still good at disappearing in the morning. 

What was even more fortunate, is that she hadn’t had to listen to them have sex again either, for that she was most thankful.

It was late Saturday night and Laura was currently sat in the living room watching TV with the lights out. 

Carmilla had picked up Elle earlier that evening and they had gone out to dinner, leaving Laura to spend another night in alone. 

She was engrossed in the lastest doctor who episode when she heard the front door open, followed by voices. Tonight she wasn’t going to be as fortunate as previous occasions, as Carmilla had clearly decided to come in for a change, instead of shooting off as usual. 

Elle entered the living room and switched on the lights, Carmilla hovering behind her. “Hey Laur, what are you doing sat in the dark?”

“Nothing just catching up on some Doctor Who,” Laura replied, before putting on a smile. “Nice night?”

“Ah it was the best,” Elle gushed. “Carmilla took me to fabulous restaurant in town, you have to try it.”

“It’s only just gone 12,” Laura observed looking at the wall clock, “thought you’d be back later.”

“Oh grump here has got a meeting tomorrow afternoon,” Elle said elbowing Carmilla playfully, “so she didn’t want to get too drunk.”

“Needs must buttercup,” Carmilla interjected.

“Whatever,” Elle said blasé, “anyway, Carmilla’s staying here tonight if that’s ok with you?”

Laura shrugged. “Not my apartment.”

Elle was expecting a ‘course, no probs’ or something along those lines, only it never came. She had no idea what was really going on of course, but she had noticed that Laura had been acting a tad strange lately, and she was starting to worry about her a little. 

Elle felt that her best friend needed to get out there again and try and meet someone, she hated seeing her spend night after night alone in the apartment, her work the only thing really happening in her life. 

Elle was thinking about setting her up with someone that she had met through Carmilla. Maybe that would work, she had to try something. She’d broach the idea with her and see what she thought.

“Right, well I’m going to make some hot chocolate,” Elle announced cheerily. “Want one?”

Laura stood up under the watchful eye of Carmilla. “I think I’m just going to go to bed.”

“Oh come on stay up a bit,” Elle pleaded. “I feel like I haven’t talked to you in days, and it is Saturday night.”

Laura quickly glanced at Carmilla before nodding her head in defeat. “Fine,” she gave in, and collapsed back down onto the sofa.

Elle turned to Carmilla. “Tea, hot chocolate?”

“Got anything stronger?” Carmilla asked.

“Sure have,” Elle smirked, cheekily pinching Carmilla’s bottom before making her way into the kitchen. 

Carmilla and Laura were again left alone, another awkward moment for them to deal with. 

Carmilla sat down and waited for Laura to initiate conversation, she knew she liked to talk, but it was never going to happen. 

“Ottawa’s quite good still,” Carmilla said in an attempt to start a conversation.

“Thought you lived in Toronto,” Laura muttered.

“I do live in Toronto,” Carmilla told her.

“Then what the hell are you doing in Ottawa?” Laura asked snottily.

“I’m here for a few weeks on business,” she answered.

Laura snorted. “So that’s what you’re calling it these days.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Carmilla asked defensively.

“And what’s going to happen to Elle when you go back to Toronto?” Laura replied with a question of her own. 

“We’ll figure something out I’m sure,” Carmilla said confidently.

Laura shook her head in disbelief. “Well no matter what happens, at least she’ll get three more months than I got.”

Carmilla bit her lip in frustration. She desperately wanted to say something to that, but she was hardly going to get involved in a conversation about them when Elle was in the next room. “So, have you just been watching TV all night?” she asked trying to lighten the current mood. You could have cut the tension with a knife. 

“Can’t afford to go swanning around living the hi-life like you do all the time,” Laura replied hostilely. “Not all made of money.”

Carmilla chose to ignore the comment, and carried on trying to be pleasant. “Cause you know, next time, maybe you could come with us?”

Laura glared at her. “What makes you think that I’d want to go anywhere with you?”

Carmilla blew out a breath. “Sundance, I’m just trying to be nice.”

“Well don’t!” Laura retorted sounding annoyed, though kept her voice down so that Elle didn’t hear. “It’s making me feel nauseous.”

Carmilla didn’t have time to say anything back as Elle entered the room with a tray carrying three drinks. “One hot chocolate for you,” she said handing it to Laura. “One hot chocolate for me,” she said to herself. “And last but not least, rum and coke for my hard working baby,” she said in a childlike voice, handing the glass to Carmilla. 

She gave Carmilla a soft kiss on the lips much to Laura’s chagrin, and then took a seat beside her girlfriend, looking between her and Laura. “So, what we talking about?” she asked.

“Nothing,” both replied quickly and simultaneously.

“O-K,” Elle giggled, before taking a sip of her hot chocolate. “So Laura, there’s something I want to ask you.”

“What’s that?” Laura asked, blowing her drink gently in an effort to cool it down. She had no idea that her actions were slowly causing Carmilla’s mouth to water. 

Carmilla remembered a moment during their night together when Laura had blown on a sensitive spot behind her ear, and made her shiver with delight. She’d give almost anything to feel that sensation again, but she was sure that only Laura would be able to pull it off. 

Elle interrupted her girlfriend’s lustful thoughts for another woman, as she replied to Laura. “Carmilla’s got this friend called Natasha, and I think she would be--”

“No,” Laura said flatly, not even letting her friend finish, whilst Carmilla looked at her girlfriend in slight shock.

“You don’t even know what I was going to say,” Elle smiled.

“Yes I do,” Laura insisted, “and no, I don’t want you to set me up with anyone.”

Carmilla looked relieved but her other half wasn’t going to give it up. 

“But you haven’t been on a date for ages,” Elle protested.

“Yeah, so,” Laura said defensively. 

Elle grinned. “Aren’t you like…I don’t know…frustrated?”

Carmilla’s ears perked up as she too was curious to the answer.

Laura rolled her eyes. “Not everything revolves around sex you know.”

“Doesn’t it?” Elle said, and playfully nudged Carmilla. Carmilla smiled but it didn’t look all that sincere.

“I’ll date when I’m ready ok,” Laura said hoping to bring an end to the subject. 

It did, but not before Elle got in one last remark. “Laura, not all women are going to be like Kara you know.”

Laura’s eyes widened slightly, as Carmilla’s narrowed in confusion.

‘Who the hell was Kara?’ Carmilla thought.

“Elle,” Laura said warningly, “I really don’t want to discuss that right now.”

Her friend held her hands up. “Ok, fine.”

Laura smiled gratefully and stood up from the sofa. “I’m going to turn in.”

“Oh don’t do that,” Elle pleaded apologetically. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“I know,” Laura said kindly, indicating that there was no damage done. “I’m just really tired.”

“You sure?” Elle checked and got to her feet. 

“I’m sure,” she confirmed, after which Elle gave her a hug. 

“Goodnight,” Laura said quietly, looking over at Carmilla with what looked to be longing in her eyes. She loved Elle to bits, and she had needed a hug, but she wanted it from someone different at that moment. 

Carmilla felt Laura's eyes on her, and returned the gaze full force. After a few moments, Laura eventually broke the hug and went to her bedroom. 

xoxoxoxox

Not long after, Carmilla and Elle decided to call it a night too. They were both lying on their backs in bed side by side, and had not long been under the covers when Carmilla’s curiosity about something that had happened earlier finally got the better of her. 

“So, who’s this Kara then?” she asked trying to sound casual.

“Laura’s ex,” Elle replied, distaste clearly present in her voice. 

“Not a fan, then?”

“Pfft, that’s putting it mildly,” Elle told her. “You wouldn’t be a fan either if you met the woman.”

Carmilla didn’t say anything, she desperately wanted to know more but didn’t know how to ask without sounding too interested in Laura’s love life, or rather lack of. 

Luckily for her, Elle continued without any prompting needed.

“She really messed Laura up for a while,” Elle started softly. “I still don’t think to this day that Laura’s over it fully.”

Carmilla couldn’t explain why, but anger irrupted within her at hearing this. She had no idea what this woman had done to Laura, but it was clear that she had hurt the blonde in some way, something that Carmilla hated her for instantly. 

For some reason, Carmilla felt the need to protect Laura. 

It was an instinct that had kicked in the night she spent with her, and it had come back the minute she laid eyes on her again. 

It was crazy she knew, but that was just how she felt. The thought of anyone hurting Laura, made her see red. 

Carmilla then felt a sense of shame, for if she wanted to protect Laura and make sure that no harm came to her, would she have really done what she did that morning in New York, and left her all alone? 

It was no excuse, but Carmilla would forever say that it was in fact the biggest regret of her life, and that she would never make the same mistake again, if she was ever given the chance to make another choice. 

Elle's voice soon interrupted her thoughts. “I don’t think she ever will either,” she said sadly, “unless she’s prepared to put herself out there and start trusting again.”

Carmilla looked over to Elle without moving her head. “What happened?”

Elle took a deep breath. “They were together for over two years, and lived together for six months. Kara was this upper class socialite if you like, you know the, ‘my mummy and daddy buy me everything’ kind of girl.” 

Carmilla snorted; she’d met her fair share of them before. 

“Anyway,” Elle continued, “when they met, Laura was completely smitten. I mean I could see why; Kara was really attractive and to be fair, she came across as a really nice girl.”

“But…?”

“Well they seemed to be really happy,” Elle remembered. “They were totally loved up and just moved in together, and then it all went downhill. Laura got this promotion at the Newspaper, something that she’d worked tooth and nail for I might add, and it started taking up a lot of her time. Time that Kara felt should have been spent on her, keep in mind this is a woman who’s never had to do a day’s work in her life. Anyway, Laura started feeling guilty about it so she took an afternoon off one day in order to go home and surprise her.”

Carmilla had a feeling what was coming next. “Laura ended up getting a shock I take it.”

“Yep,” Elle nodded. “She went into the bedroom and found Kara in their bed, with another woman.”

Carmilla went numb as she thought about much heartache that must have caused Laura, and now hoped to run into Kara one day. “That’s…terrible.”

“Oh it gets better,” Elle added in disgust. “The malicious bitch then tried to turn it all around and make out that it was Laura’s fault for not paying enough attention to her.”

“You’re kidding?”

“No,” Elle replied. “She said she bought it on herself. I mean they broke up obviously but, the crazy thing is, that Laura actually believed it. She said she didn’t but I could just tell that she did, I mean the poor girl blames herself for everything bad that happens in her life. She just…closed herself off to everyone for such a long time after that, and I hate seeing her so…vulnerable.”

“Well, maybe she just needs a little bit more time to get over it,” Carmilla said thoughtfully, “couldn’t have been a good advertisement for relationships walking in on something like that.”

Elle rolled onto her side to face Carmilla and leant up on her elbow. “But that’s just the thing, she did get over it, I mean it took a while but she did it you know. Her job really started to take off, and she even got asked her to go to New York for work.” 

Carmilla’s whole body went rigid and her mouth instantly went dry, as Elle kept talking. “She was so thrilled and…proud of herself for once, like she should be. She was ecstatic.” 

Carmilla cleared her throat. “Well that’s a good thing right?” she asked nonchalantly.

“Yeah, well, it was supposed to be,” Elle said sadly. “But when she came back, she went back to the same Laura she was just after she broke up with Kara.”

Carmilla felt sick. “Why?” she croaked.

“I don’t know,” Elle shrugged. “She hasn’t said anything, but I just know something happened in New York that she’s not letting me in on. I’ve tried talking to her about it but she’s not having any of it.”

“M-m-maybe she just wants to forget about it,” Carmilla offered feebly.

“Mmm, I’m sure she’ll find someone eventually,” Elle mused looking thoughtful.

“Yeah,” Carmilla agreed unenthusiastically. 

Elle smiled at Carmilla and then snuggled down onto her chest. “I’m just glad I got me one of the good one’s,” she sighed in bliss.

Carmilla just closed her eyes in despair. She didn’t think it was possible, but the situation had just got much worse.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again I would just like to express my thanks for all the lovely comments. 
> 
> This continues on from the previous chapter

Carmilla tried in vain for the next hour to get to sleep.  Elle had dozed off as soon as her head hit Carmilla’s chest, but Carmilla was still wide awake.  

 

She couldn’t stop thinking about the woman in the next room and the distress her actions had caused her.  

 

She of course wasn’t to know about what this woman Kara had done to Laura, for she had never mentioned her by name.  

 

They had talked for hours at the bar in New York, but the only thing that Carmilla knew about Laura’s love life was that she’d been in two relationships before, and that was about it.  

 

It was clear from the time they had spent talking that Laura was a romantic who desperately wanted to be in love, but it seemed that she was too scared to give it another try after being treated so badly by someone she thought she could trust.  

 

Well, that was the way it seemed  _now_.  

 

Elle indicated earlier that Laura was fine when she went to New York, ecstatic even, but was a mess when she came back. 

 

Carmilla cringed and her heart tightened painfully;  _she_  was the reason that Laura didn’t trust anyone right now.  

 

This Kara had done enough damage to last a lifetime, but Laura had managed to move past it, enough to flirt with Carmilla in New York and take a chance once again, but then Carmilla had to go and mess everything up, like she usually did when it came to women in her life.

 

In reality, when it came to matters of the heart, Carmilla Karnstein didn’t have a clue, and she wasn’t sure whether she ever would.

 

Carmilla eventually gave up trying to sleep, and gently removed Elle from her chest careful not to wake her.  

 

She got out of bed, crept out of the room and headed for the kitchen. Her mouth kept going dry for some reason and she was in desperate need of some water. 

 

Upon reaching the kitchen, Carmilla took a bottle of water out of the fridge and sat at the table, not bothering with the light as there was enough coming from the moon through the window.  

 

She guzzled the water down, immediately feeling better for it, and then put her head in her hands.  She had no idea how she was going to do to get out of the mess she had created for herself.  

 

It was with regret now that she had asked Laura to keep quiet and not tell Elle about them, something she knew Laura wasn’t happy about, and what had probably made things worse between her and Laura if that was even possible.  

 

Carmilla knew it was time to start being honest with herself.  She really liked Elle, and she wanted to make things work between them from the start because she was sick of flings, but things were so different now.

 

 After she’d spent the night with Laura in New York, she wanted more of her.  Carmilla had never felt like that with the any of the other women she’d been with before; one night was always enough.  

 

It had scared her, but afterwards it made her see that maybe she could be happy with just one woman after all, if she just worked at it.  

 

Unfortunately, she realised too late; she had already left Laura in the hotel room and was on the plane back to Canada when it finally hit home that a relationship could be good for her.  

 

So in the end when she met Elle, she thought she’d been given another chance.  She never thought she would see Laura again, if she did she wouldn’t have entertained the notion of being with another woman; she would have simply waited for the one she really wanted.  

 

But now that she had seen Laura again, she was all she could think about.  

 

Seeing her but not being able to touch her was agonizing, and she wasn’t sure how much longer she could take it. 

 

It was at that moment that Laura entered the kitchen, her breath hitching in her throat when she saw who was at the table.  

 

Carmilla looked up to see who had made the sound of surprise, and her mouth instead of going dry, started to water at what she was faced with.  

 

There in front of her, illuminated by the moonlight stood Laura, in nothing but a white silk nightdress.  

 

Carmilla willed herself to stop gazing but it was impossible, she couldn’t take her eyes away from her.

 

Laura got over the preliminary shock of seeing Carmilla sitting there in the dark, and cocked her head to the side.  “What are you staring at?” she asked coldly, as she walked over to the kettle.

 

“Eh…n-n-nothing, just the stars,” Carmilla stuttered.  She watched closely as Laura reached up to the cupboard above her, her nightdress hugging her body deliciously as she raised her arm to reach for a cup.  “I-I-I couldn’t sleep,” Carmilla told her.

 

“I didn’t ask,” Laura said frostily.  She put a teabag in the cup and then turned around to see Carmilla watching her every move.  “Will you stop looking at me?!” she demanded fiercely.

 

“I can’t help it,” Carmilla said quietly, immediately regretting what had just come out of her mouth. 

 

Laura’s eyes narrowed into slits.  “What did you just say?”

 

Carmilla finally looked away, shaking her head quickly as if she was trying to clear her thoughts.  “Nothing, it was…nothing.”

 

“That’s what I thought,” Laura said in a deadly tone.  “You best get back to bed?  Your girlfriend will be getting cold.”

 

Carmilla shook her head in disappointment, she knew she deserved the treatment that she was getting, but she hated Laura being so bitter towards her.  

 

She has seen what Laura looked like when she was happy, and she desperately wanted to see it again.  

 

She ignored the part of her brain that told her she was playing with fire, and slowly got up from the table to approach Laura, who instinctively took a step back.

 

“Get away from me,” Laura said gravely.

 

Carmilla wasn’t put off and stepped closer.  “Why are you being like this?”

 

“Like what?” Laura spat.

 

“So cold and hard,” Carmilla replied.  “It’s not you cupcake.”

 

“You know  _nothing_  about me,” Laura told her. 

 

Carmilla got even closer until Laura was backed up against the counter.  “Cutie, I know more than most,” she said huskily.

 

Laura laughed sardonically.  “What, you think because you saw me naked, that that means you know me?”

 

“You’d be surprised how open it makes you,” Carmilla replied softly. 

 

“Well then you must know Elle inside out by now,” Laura retorted cruelly. 

 

Carmilla was starting to get tired of the insults and erroneously fired back.  “Yeah, but she still doesn’t come as hard for me as you did that night in New York.”

 

Laura’s face went like thunder and Carmilla closed her eyes in instantaneous regret.  But before she had a chance to even begin to apologise, Laura slapped her hard across the face.  

 

Carmilla didn’t even flinch as their eyes locked intensely.  

 

Moments later and tears began to form in Laura’s eyes; she couldn’t stand being this close to Carmilla any longer for fear of what her heart would permit her to do, regardless of how wrong it would be.  She had to get away from her now.

 

 “Stay away from me,” Laura ordered softly.  She then walked out of the kitchen leaving Carmilla alone. 

 

Carmilla closed her eyes and sighed loudly.  Things just kept getting worse.

 

****

 

Over the next few days, Carmilla stayed well out of Laura’s way.  

 

She didn’t show her face at the apartment, telling Elle that she was overloaded with work, which she was to some extent.  

Her girlfriend didn’t question it for which Carmilla was relieved.  It gave her the opportunity to catch up on some of her cases at work and also gave her time to try and process what was going on in her head.  

 

But as she sat in the luxury apartment that partners at her firm used when in Ottawa on business, she struggled to think about work.  She had casefiles and notes spread out in front of her, but all she could think about was a certain journalist.

 

The tension between her and Laura was building up on a daily basis, and it was only a matter of time until one of them exploded.   For Laura, it would probably be in anger, but for Carmilla, it would be in passion.  

 

It was getting more and more difficult for Carmilla to see Laura, and that night in the kitchen, Carmilla had almost given in to her feelings.  She desperately wanted to take Laura there and then right against the kitchen table tops, but was totally caught off guard by the harsh slap she had received, for saying something that she knew had been entirely out of order.  

 

Laura had every right to be angry with her, she totally understood that, but she did feel that the tiny blonde was going a bit too far.  The not so subtle ways in which Laura kept reminding her that Elle was her girlfriend, was irritating her to no end, even if she did have a point.  

 

But Carmilla couldn’t help how she felt, and she was getting tired of fighting whatever it was that her heart was telling her to feel for Laura, but she had no idea how to even begin working it out.

 

She looked at her watch and saw that it was 7.00pm; she was due to pick Elle up in half an hour.  Her girlfriend had called to let her know that she was going to be a little late, and to just meet her at the apartment.  With that in mind, Carmilla grabbed the keys to her car, and headed to Elle’s.

 

In another part of Ottawa, Laura was dealing with the same feelings as Carmilla.  

 

She was relieved that Carmilla had stayed away for the past few days, as seeing her right now would only confuse her even more.  

 

That night in the kitchen had troubled her to say the least, not because of what happened, but because of what  _almost_  happened.  

 

As soon as Carmilla invaded her personal space during their battle of wit, Laura felt herself gradually loose the will to resist what she wanted so badly in that moment, which was for Carmilla to start ripping her clothes off and make her moan like she did so effortlessly during their night together.  

 

In some twisted way, she was thankful that Carmilla had said something to piss her off on a whole new level, thus extinguishing her lust and replacing it with fury.   Carmilla’s comment had disgusted her but she did feel guilty for slapping her across the face, even though it had got out some of the pent up frustration that had been building up inside her for a year. 

 

The doorbell sounding disturbed her thoughts, and she sluggishly got up from the sofa to go answer the door.  Laura opened it and her mood soured instantly.  “Elle’s not here,” she said harshly, even before Carmilla had a chance to say anything.

 

Carmilla looked slightly shocked at the tone Laura was using with her still, but didn’t dare say anything detrimental, for fear of worsening an already uncomfortable situation.  “Look, she called to say she was running a bit late and asked if I could meet her here.”

 

Laura made no move to invite her in.  “Like I said, she’s not here.”

 

CAarmilla glanced briefly at the floor.  She hated this side of Laura no matter how understandable it was why the she was acting in such a way; it just didn’t suit her at all.  

 

She also felt hurt that Laura appeared to have no intention of showing the tiniest bit of remorse for the slap she’d given her a few days ago, even if she did deserve it.  “Well then…can I come in and wait please?” she asked quietly, “seeing as how it’s raining out here.”

 

Laura noticed that the rain had suddenly gotten heavier, but wanted nothing more than to leave Carmilla where she was just out of spite, though, the thought had left her mind just as soon as it had entered.  

 

It wasn’t in her nature to do things so unkind to people, no matter what they’d done.  

 

Yes, she had gave Carmilla a slap but it was well deserved, and she did feel guilty about it, not that she was about to apologise.  The only thing she could manage in that moment was a cold stare, before simply walking off and leaving the door open for Carmilla to enter.

 

Carmilla cautiously walked in and then closed the door behind her.  She removed her leather jacket and hung it up, shivering momentarily afterwards as her body started to adjust to the welcoming warmth of Elle and Laura's apartment.  

 

She took a deep breath and entered the living room.  Laura was sat at the end of a three piece sofa with her feet tucked up to the side, zoning in on the TV.  

 

Carmilla looked around gingerly, before going to take a seat at the other end of the sofa on which Laura was sat.  Her bum didn’t even touch the cushion before Laura spoke without so much as glancing away from the television.

 

“Ehh, I don’t think so,” she said flatly, before pointing to the other side of the room where another sofa was situated.  “Over there.”

 

Carmilla was still in mid crouch when she got the order, but after blinking in initial disbelief at the harshness of Laura’s tone, she slowly stood up straight and sauntered over to the other side of the room as she was told.   

 

Finally sitting down, she started to get herself comfortable.  It was an impossible task, the tension in the room making it a pointless exercise form the beginning.  After about ten minutes of unbearable silence, she glanced over at Laura who had not still looked at her since she came in to the living room, and leant forward.  She leaned her forearms on her thighs and clasped her fingers together.

 

“So,” Carmilla started warily, “what are you--“

 

“Don’t talk to me,” Laura cut her off coldly, still not looking away from the TV.

 

Carmilla was sure that the programme ‘Country File’ wasn’t so engrossing, that its viewers couldn’t bear to take their eyes away for one solitary second.  Laura was clearly making a point of ignoring her, probably putting on the TV and watching anything regardless of the content just to get out of conversing with her, not that she could blame her; their last chat didn’t exactly go too well.  

 

The current hostility in that moment would have probably been quite funny to an outsider, but Carmilla was determined to get Laura to talk, no matter the anger that would surely follow. 

 

They had to find a way to get past this. 

 

Carmilla gestured to the TV, “Didn’t take you to be the type of girl who’d watch stuff like that.”

 

Laura finally made eye contact.  “Well, do I look like the type of girl that would go to bed with a heartless bitch?  Because I did that once too,” she stated callously, “but then again, you knew that already.”  Laura gave Carmilla another menacing look and then went back to watching the TV.

 

Laura's words hit Carmilla excruciatingly hard, but she had to believe that they were spoken in anger and nothing else.  They may have only known each other properly for one night only, but Carmilla knew Laura was not the person she was portraying to be. 

 

It was with difficulty but Carmilla tried to smile.  “Ouch cupcake.”

 

“Just don’t speak to me, alright,” Laura demanded.

 

“Why not?”

 

“Are you deaf?!” Laura enquired forcefully.

 

Carmilla remained calm.  “I think you’re acting like a child.”

 

“Well I think you should tell someone who’ll give a shit!” Laura exploded.

 

Carmilla’s face went soft but serious, as she realised that this would get them nowhere.  “Laura please, I just want to talk to you.”

 

Laura got up from the sofa.  “You and I, have  _nothing_  else to say to each other.”

 

Carmilla also got to her feet.  “Yeah, well there’s things I want to say.”

 

“Well I don’t want to hear it,” Laura told her. 

 

“Really?” Carmilla challenged.  “You’re not interested in why I had to get away that morning as fast as I could?”

 

Laura snorted as if her question was absurd.  “I know why!  You fucked me and then did what you probably did to all the other women you’ve used over the years; you ran away as fast your legs could carry you for fear of me suggesting maybe meeting up again in the future, god forbid!”

 

“That’s not true,” Carmilla said quietly.

 

“What I’m not even warm?” Laura asked mockingly. 

 

“Laura, it wasn’t like that.”

 

“Then what was it like?!” Laura asked frantically, throwing her arms up in the air out of pure frustration.  “You can’t do what you did and then expect me to believe that you’re a nice person!”

 

“Look, I made a mistake ok,” Carmilla tried to defend, though by the look on Laura’s face it made no difference.  “I know that doesn’t make everything better, and if you want to use what I did as grounds to think of me as the worse person in the world then fine!  But I am not as bad a person as you’d like to think I am.” 

 

“Ok fine,” Laura smiled falsely.  “You know what?  I don’t even know why I’m standing ere listening to this.  You fed me enough crap when we were in New York, and I’ll be damned if I’m going stay here and let you feed me anymore.” 

 

“Laura…”

 

The blonde ignored her and started to leave the room, but then turned around before she got to the doorway.  “In fact, yeah, there is one thing that I’d really like to know.”

 

“What?” Carmilla asked.

 

“Was there anything at all about that night in New York that was actually genuine on your part, I mean was any of it even real?” Laura asked bitingly. “Or was it all just bullshit huh?”

 

Carmilla was sick and tired of lying to herself; she had to be completely honest.  “Cupcake, a _ll of it_  was real,” she replied in almost a whisper.

 

Laura didn’t give any indication as to what she thought of Carmilla's admission and she wasn’t about to either, but inside, her stomach was doing flips.  She was sure that she could see the same craving in Carmilla’s eyes that she saw in New York that night, the same flicker of desire that she had seen after she slapped her a few days ago.  

 

Laura’s heart begun to thud loudly against her chest, but she was soon bought back to reality when she noticed a picture on the fireplace of her and her best friend. 

 

She had to stop this.

 

“Your  _girlfriend_  will be home soon,” Laura reminded her pointedly, the word ‘girlfriend’ making her heart twinge in pain. “So I’d tread very carefully if I were you.”

 

“You asked me, and I answered,” Carmilla said gently.

 

Their eyes locked again, much like they did that night in the kitchen, and it was in that moment that both of them realised they were in trouble.  

 

It was going to take a miracle to keep at bay whatever it was that was burning so powerfully within them, something which was so desperate to be released.  

 

But what scared both of them the most was the realization that they would only be able to get it out of their systems with each other, and no one else.  But they knew that couldn’t happen, and it was killing them both.

 

Laura almost unnoticeably shook her head, as if to signal ‘no’ to the silent question which Carmilla's eyes were asking. 

 

“Laura…” Carmilla almost pleaded.

 

“I can’t,” Laura said in almost a whisper, before slowly walking out of the room.


	6. Chapter 6

The next week passed in somewhat of a blur for both girls. Carmilla hadn’t seen anything of Laura ever since she had left her standing in Elle’s living room feeling more confused than ever. 

Their heated discussion had got some things out in the open, but had caused even more confusion. Neither of them had actually come out and admitted that there was still something between them, but you didn’t have to be a genius to figure out the code that they had started communicating to each other in. 

The nasty insults along with the dirty looks was Laura’s way of conversing what she was feeling, and taking it all on the chin as well as making inappropriate comments was Carmilla's way of saying ‘you mean the same to me’. 

Neither of them could come out and actually say what they really felt, for fear that the situation would become more real. 

Both of them were scared out of their wits because of what they were feeling, Laura because she always gave her heart only to have it trampled on and she was afraid of the same thing happening again, and Carmilla simply because she never gave her heart to anyone, and was still afraid to. 

Carmilla was currently sat in Elle's kitchen waiting for her girlfriend to get out of the shower. 

They had plans to go out that night as Carmilla had again used work as the reason for not being around the past week, which Elle didn’t question; instead of telling the truth which was that she couldn’t face seeing Laura at the moment. 

She apologised for her absence and assured Elle that they would get to together at the weekend. She built herself up inside during that time to herself, at the prospect of seeing the Laura, who had filled her dreams for the last week, and was actually disappointed to find out that Laura was holed up in her bedroom when she arrived at their apartment. 

She would say that she arrived early to see Elle as they hadn’t seen each other at all that week, but if she was being honest, she was hoping to see Laura there. 

It wasn’t because she wanted to speak to her about anything in particular, she wouldn’t have a clue where to start, but she just wanted to see her face. 

When Carmilla turned up Laura was nowhere to be seen, and Elle mentioned to her that Laura had been acting a bit weird all week, and that when she’d asked her friend what was wrong, the reply was that it was simply down to tiredness. Carmilla of course knew different. Laura was deliberately avoiding her. 

So, Carmilla had turned up early for no reason as it turned out, and now had to wait for Elle to get ready. It was going to be a couple of hours at least knowing her girlfriend. 

She gulped down some of the rum and coke from the glass tumbler in her hand, and was idly flipping through some magazines that were on the kitchen table, when someone entered the room unnoticed. 

She carried on scanning the pages when a particular spread caught her eye and made her snort. “Oh ‘Vanity Fair’ you stink,” she muttered to herself in a comical way. 

A tiny giggle from within the kitchen made her head snap up in surprise, and her mouth almost hit the table instantly at the sight. 

Laura was standing in front of her wearing a long, strapless red dress, looking as beautiful as ever. “Hi,” Laura said quietly, her face indecipherable. 

Carmilla picked her mouth up from the table and scrunched her face up in utter confusion, stupidly looking behind herself before realising that it was impossible for anyone else to be there. Laura was talking to her. “Hi,” she said unsurely. 

Laura crossed her arms at the wrist and cleared her throat, the smallest smile starting to creep onto her face. She pointed briefly to the magazines. “So you mock the type of TV I watch and now you’re mocking’ my taste in magazines?” she joked softly. 

Carmilla hoped that she had heard right, as she wasn’t really taking notice of anything but Laura’s dress and how good she looked in it. 

She was also somewhat surprised that Laura wasn’t being frosty and insulting her for once but pleasant, not that she was complaining, and decided to go with it. 

She closed the magazine and pushed it to the side with the others. “Well, you’ve got ‘Vanity Fair’, ‘Xtra Ottawa’ ‘Weekly Insider’. I can’t help feeling betrayed,” she said light heartedly. “I was sure that you’d be an ‘Xtra Toronto’ kind of girl.” 

Laura smiled shyly, before licking her lips and folding her arms giddily. “I just can’t bring myself to buy it at the moment.”

“Well that’s understandable,” Carmilla commented with a chuckle, “seeing as how you hate me.”

Laura looked down awkwardly, then unfolded her arms and started playing with her fingers. “I don’t hate you,” she told her quietly.

“No?” Carmilla asked hopefully, her heart in her mouth.

“No,” Laura replied with a shake of the head, before then meeting Carmilla’s eyes. “I’ve had so much time to think things this week. And you know what, you were right.”

“About?” Carmilla asked curiously.

“When you said that being cold and hard wasn’t me,” Laura answered softly. “You’re right. I don’t like being that way. I don’t …want to be that way, I was just...”

“Scorned?” Carmilla offered teasingly.

“Yeah,” Laura nodded with a small grin, “something like that.”

“I understand,” Carmilla said gently.

“I just don’t want to be angry at you anymore,” Laura told her quietly. 

“Even though you should be?” Carmilla asked hoarsely.

“Yeah,” Laura giggled, “even though I should be.”

Carmilla slowly got up from her chair and cautiously approached Laura, relieved to see that this time Laura didn’t move away. She looked deeply into her eyes and gazed at her apologetically. “I’m sorry for what I said to you the last time I was here,” she said gently.

Laura blushed and then grinned out of embarrassment. “I’m sorry too. I so overreacted.”

“No you didn’t,” Carmilla told her comfortingly. “I deserved it. What I said to you was completely out of order.”

“Well, I’ve not exactly made things easy for you have I,” Laura admitted. 

Carmilla looked down not wanting to comment, causing Laura to laugh. “You don’t have to say it.”

Carmilla looked up and smiled, before her face turned serious. “Laura, I am so sorry.”

“I know,” Laura nodded, still smiling bravely. “I know you are.”

“Cupcake, I really wish things were diff--”

“They’re not,” Laura cut her off smoothly, wishing upon every force known to life that they were.

Carmilla closed her eyes briefly in order to gain some composure, the piercing pain shooting through her chest causing her to tremble slightly. “Cupcake…”

“This has to stop,” Laura told her in the nicest tone she could muster.

“Laura--” 

“My best friend is your girlfriend,” Laura said delicately.

“I know that,” Carmilla croaked.

“I just think that it would be best for all of us, if we just pretend that what happened in New York…didn’t,” Laura said desolately, “which means that we don’t talk about it again…ever.”

Carmilla swallowed hard. “So that’s it?” she asked despondently.

“It has to be,” Laura replied just as poignant.

“You certainly have been thinking a lot,” Carmilla observed, though not in a detrimental way.

They both locked gazes, but it didn’t take long before Laura had to look away, for fear that she may literally jump on what she had wanted so badly for the past few weeks. 

“Look I’ll make a deal with you,” Laura said, trying her best to sound cheery. “I’ll stop giving you a hard time, if you give me an honest opinion about how I look tonight.”

“Laura…”

Laura stepped away and did a slow twirl. “You’re good with fashion right?” she asked teasingly.

Carmilla folded her arms but couldn’t raise a smile. She was so happy that she and Laura were now being civil, but she wanted so much more than that, and she was sure that Laura wanted the same thing. 

She wasn’t sure before but she knew that look on Laura's face, it was the same look she had gotten all night in New York. 

The woman in front of her had completely turned her world upside down, and now she had to come up with a word to describe how Laura looked to her at that moment. 

Carmilla plucked the word straight from her heart. “Beautiful,” she told her simply. “You’re Beautiful.”

Laura blushed and then smiled shyly. “Thank you.”

Moments later and Elle entered the kitchen. “Laura,” she said in surprise at Laura’s appearance. “What are you doing all dressed up? I thought you decided not to go in the end.”

“Well yeah I did,” Laura shrugged with a smile. “But I thought about it some more and thought what the hell.”

“Fancy night out?” Carmilla asked. 

She was ecstatic that they were talking to each other like human beings at last, no matter how much pain she felt right now after being told by Laura to forget what had happened between them completely.

“Sort of,” Laura replied. “My boss is putting on this function at some fancy hotel, and paying for us all to get drunk and stay there the night.”

“Cool boss,” Carmilla commented, “which hotel?”

“The Westin,” Laura answered happily.

Elle let out a long whistle; that was one of the best hotels in Ottawa. “Very cool boss.”

“Well, it’s been a while since I’ve gone out, so I thought I’d go and enjoy myself for once,” Laura added.

“Good for you Laur, you deserve a night out,” Elle commented, happy that her friend was finally getting back to her normal self. “Don’t forget to call me when you get there and let me know the room number and phone extension.”

“Elle,” Laura chuckled. “I’m a big girl I can look after myself.”

Elle raised a hand. “I only want it in case of an emergency.”

“Fine,” Laura gave in, “Look I’ve got to go, have a nice night you two.” She smiled shyly at Carmilla, and then left for her party. 

Carmilla watched as Laura walked out of the kitchen, and would swear that she felt her heart go with her. As soon as Laura disappeared from sight she felt empty. It was as if the only way she felt alive recently, was when she was in the presence of the beauty that had just sent her the sweetest smile she had ever received. 

Carmilla’s heart was desperately trying to get a message to her brain, but it still wouldn’t acknowledge what it was hearing.

It couldn’t be that. It just couldn’t.

****

Elle and Carmilla went out to dinner that night but didn’t stay out all that long. They got back to the apartment fairly early and decided just to laze on the sofa and watch a dvd for a change. 

They were in the middle of the movie when Elle started to plant light kisses on Carmilla’s neck. 

Carmilla closed her eyes in concentration, desperately trying to get turned on, something that she never had to do before. 

She was about to give up and push Elle away, when her girlfriend’s mobile saved her the trouble. 

Elle looked at her mobile, smiled when she saw who was calling and answered it. “Well it’s about time Hollis?” she teased, reaching for a pen and paper from a nearby table. She placed the phone in the crook of her neck and took down the information Laura was giving her. 

“Ok babe, got it. I won’t keep you, so have fun and don’t do anything I would dooooo,” she said jokingly. “Love ya and goodnight.” Elle hung up the phone and chucked the pad on the table, before attacking Carmilla's neck with her lips once more.

Carmilla recoiled from her touch. “Not tonight ok,” she said quietly.

Elle looked at her a little upset. “Okay, we don’t have to do anything.”

Carmilla felt guilty for hurting her feelings but she just couldn’t face the prospect of sleeping with anyone right now. Well, she probably would make an exception for one person in particular. If she was totally honest, she hadn’t been able to enjoy sex with Elle ever since she saw Laura in the kitchen that fateful morning. “I’m just not really in the mood.”

“Well, are you okay?” Elle asked concerned. “I mean it’s been over a week since we last...”

“I’m fine,” Carmilla fibbed. “I’ve just got so much going on what with work and…my head’s just all over the place at the minute.”

Elle smiled and tried to be understanding. “Okay, that’s fine, we don’t have to do anything.”

Carmilla looked slightly relieved at this statement. “In fact, I think I’m just going to stay at mine tonight, I’ve got so much to do.”

Carmilla got up from the sofa followed by her girlfriend. “Are you sure everything’s okay?” Elle asked worried.

“Yeah course,” Carmilla squeaked. 

“Have I done something wrong?” Elle asked in a small voice.

“No, of course not,” Carmilla replied truthfully, before dishonesty flowed from her mouth. “I’ve just got a lot on that’s all.” 

She hated lying to her, but Carmilla needed to get out of the apartment fast, if not, the all-consuming guilt that she felt for making her unsuspecting doting girlfriend question herself would make her blurt out the truth there and then and she couldn’t allow that to happen right now.

Elle didn’t look too convinced but smiled bravely anyway. “Okay, I understand. “

“I’m really sorry, Elle,” Carmilla apologised, only it sounded as though she was apologising for more than just ending their evening together early.

Elle shrugged. “It’s okay really, I know that your job is demanding. It’s fine.” 

Carmilla glanced at the floor, she felt like shit for lying to her. 

“Oh I just thought, that top you left last weeks in my room,” Elle said starting to walk past her. “I’ll go get it while I remember, I won’t be a sec.”

“Thanks,” Carmilla said gratefully, before looking at the table where Laura’s hotel info was scribbled on a pad. 

She couldn’t help herself. 

She knew she could be regarded as the scum of the earth for what was going through her mind, but the pull was too strong. 

She made a mental note of the room number, and went into the hallway where Elle appeared not long after with her top. 

“Here you go,” Elle said handing it to her.

“Thanks,” Carmilla said taking it from her. 

“So.”

“Mmm.”

“Don’t work too hard,” her girlfriend told her softly.

“Try not to,” Carmilla said quietly. 

“Will you phone me tomorrow?” Elle asked hopefully.

“Yeah of course I will,” Carmilla replied.

Elle smiled and then gently planted her lips against Carmilla's. She let them linger for a while before pulling back and gazing into her eyes. “Sweet dreams.”

“You too,” Carmilla returned, and then walked to the front door. She opened it and disappeared into the night, leaving Elle with a feeling of dread mounting within her stomach.

Something wasn’t right.

****

Laura had just retired to her hotel room for the night. It wasn’t the best party she had been to, though, the state of mind she was in didn’t help her chances of having the best time. 

It hadn’t been bad, she had managed to mingle with some of her work friends and also met some new people but her heart wasn’t in it entirely. 

No matter what she did, who she talked to or who she met, she couldn’t get a particular person out of her mind. 

Getting out had done her the world of good but, she had been here before and was only too familiar with the implications of her problem. 

The only remedy that was going to cure what she had was time, and she could only hope that she could go through it all again and come out of it with at least some sanity remaining. 

There was of course another remedy, but that was totally out of the question. Unfortunately, when it came to a broken heart, solutions were few and far between. 

She sat down on the bed and kicked her shoes off to the side, sighing out loud as though she had the weight of the world on her shoulders. 

She was about to fall backwards when a knock at the door made her feel like crying. All she wanted to do was sleep, not that she’d be able to, but the thought was nice.

She sluggishly got to her feet and went to open the door, firmly intent on telling her colleagues that she’d really had enough for the night and that they should go on and enjoy the rest of the party without her. 

Upon opening the door Laura froze, taking in a sharp intake of breath when she saw who was standing in front of her looking like a lost kitten.

“What are you doing here?” Laura asked in shock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to leave it like that, hoping to get the next chapter up as soon as! Again thanks for all your lovely messages, you guys rock!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You have all been so nice that I thought a double update would be a nice thing to give back to you.
> 
> This chapter picks up exactly where we left off

“I needed to see you,” Carmilla replied hoarsely. “Can I come in?”

“How did you know what room I was in,” Laura enquired not answering the question.

Carmilla didn’t quite understand the relevance seeing as how she was already there, but answered anyway. “You phoned and told Elle.”

“You asked her what room I was staying in?” Laura asked in slight disgust.

“No, no, I…I-she wrote it down on a pad,” Carmilla explained. “I might have looked.”

Laura sighed. “Okay, you need to go, now.”

“Why?” Carmilla whispered.

“You know why,” Laura replied incredulously.

“Please Laura, I just want to talk to you” Carmilla pleaded.

“Now is really not a good time for this,” Laura told her seriously.

Carmilla’s stomach plummeted and she looked at the door as if there was a chance that she’d be able to see through it. “Why have you got someone in there with you?” she asked softly. 

“Not that it’s any of your business,” Laura stated calmly, “but no, I haven’t got anyone in here. I just don’t think it’ll look good if you and I are here together, it would look suspicious.”

“And who’s going to see us Cupcake?” Carmilla asked.

“Some of the people that I’m here with tonight know Elle, and I don’t want them to see me with you,” Laura told her strongly.

“Well you best let me in then cupcake?” Carmilla said softly.

Laura looked at her warningly. “Go home,” she advised, before shutting the door. 

Carmilla closed her eyes, put her hands on the door and rested her forehead against it. “Sundance please, I’m sorry okay? I know I keep saying the wrong things but…please, I just need to talk to you.”

On the other side, Laura was doing her best to keep the tears from falling. “Go away Carm,” she pleaded weakly.

Carmilla winced at hearing Laura’s breaking voice, but remained resolute. “Cupcake, I’m not leaving.”

Laura furiously wiped at the tears which were now falling down her cheeks and sniffed loudly. “Go!”

Carmilla kept her forehead against the door. “I’m not leaving. I’ll sit outside this door all night if I have to,” she told her determinedly.

Laura put both hands over her face and continued to sob quietly, she couldn’t understand why Carmilla was doing this to her. 

She shook her head in an effort to clear her thoughts, and steeled herself inside for just a few moments. 

“Do what you want Carm, I’m not interested anymore,” she insisted strongly, before going over to the bed in a hope that she could ignore what, or rather who, was right outside her door.

Carmilla thought nothing of the tone Laura used with her; she knew it was a rouse. 

She waited for a few moments to see if Laura would say anything else, but in the end knew that that was the end of the conversation for now. 

Carmilla slowly turned around, leant her back against the door and then slid to the floor. She meant what she said. She wasn’t going anywhere and she would sit there the whole night if that was what it took to get Laura to talk to her.

****

Two hours later and Laura was still wide awake. Lying on her back on top of the bed covers still clothed, she couldn’t help but glancing over to the door to her hotel room wondering if Carmilla was still there. 

Laura hadn’t heard a sound in the past couple of hours and was sure that Carmilla had finally took the hint and left. 

She rolled onto her side and closed her eyes in a hope of salvaging some sleep. 

Moments later and the hotel room phone began to ring.

Sighing in defeat, she reached up and answerer it. “Hello.”

“Miss Hollis?” the voice asked on the other end.

“Yes,” she yawned.

“This is the hotel manager. I’m so sorry to be disturbing you at this time of the night, but I’ve received some complaints from the other guests that there is someone sitting in a corridor on the tenth floor outside room 307, your room Miss Hollis. I don’t suppose you know anything about that do you?”

Laura briefly shut her eyes and shook her head in disbelief; Carmilla was still outside the door. “I’m sorry I’ll take care of it.”

“Please don’t hesitate to contact me should you need assistance, Miss Hollis. Thank you and Goodnight ”

“Yeah night,” Laura returned, before putting the phone down and making her way over to the door. She took a deep breath and then opened it quickly. 

Carmilla immediately fell into the doorway having had her weight up against the door, her back hitting the floor with a small thud. “Ouch,” she voiced in a funny voice, but then looked up to see Laura glaring at her.

“In,” Laura instructed her brusquely, her tone scolding. 

Carmilla did as she was told. She got up from the floor and made her way inside the room, Laura closing the door behind them. 

She turned around and put her hand on her hips not looking the slightest bit impressed. “Have you completely lost your mind?”

Carmilla shrugged. “I told you I wouldn’t go anywhere till you talked to me sundance.”

“Did you not listen to a word I said to you in the kitchen tonight?” Laura asked upset. “I told you I didn’t want to talk about it anymore.”

Carmilla was happy that Laura hadn’t returned to talking to her in a livid manner, but she was unsettled that she now instead sounded sad. 

“Look, I don’t…it’s not…I just need to know something ok? And then after that if you don’t want to talk about it further, I’ll leave you alone, I promise.”

Laura folded her arms and let out a cavernous breath. “What?”

Carmilla took a step closer to her. “Last week when we had that argument at the apartment, you asked me if any of it was real.”

“Yes,” Laura acknowledged. She remembered asking the question and the answer that followed it vividly, for it had kept her awake every night for the past week. 

“Why?” Carmilla whispered.

“Why what?” Laura croaked timidly.

“Why did you ask me that?” Carmilla questioned softly, “I mean you go on like that night was nothing…”

“Isn’t that how you treated it?” Laura accused despondently.

“Laura please, I just need to know,” Carmilla implored.

Laura laughed acerbically. “What does it matter?”

“It matters to me,” Carmilla replied with her heart in her throat.

Laura thought about telling her where to go, but seeing Carmilla look so fraught made her take pity on her, and the caring nature inside of her meant she caved within a minute. 

She sighed and bit her lip nervously, before entering into a subject that she knew shouldn’t even be open for discussion purely out of respect for her best friend. 

“Because I needed to know if I was really as meaningless as you made me feel that morning,” Laura replied desolately.

The look on Laura’s face as she spoke these words broke Carmilla’s heart in two. The guilt overpowered her quickly and made her feel as though she was the worst person in the world at that moment, Carmilla knew that she had hurt Laura, but she didn’t know just how much.

“You weren’t meaningless,” Carmilla insisted softly.

“What is it that you want from me?” Laura asked emotionally, ignoring her comment. “Forgiveness? Is that what you’re after? Fine, you got it.”

“No, that not what I’m after I just… I just want…” Carmilla sighed in frustration as she struggled to say what she was feeling. 

“What?” Laura asked impatiently.

“I don’t know,” Carmilla replied feeling completely lost. 

Laura shook her head; she couldn’t take much more of this. “Why are you here again? Aren’t you supposed to be with Elle tonight?” she questioned, trying her best to sound bored.

Carmilla snorted. “Why is it that every time I try to talk to you about you and me, you bring Elle into it?”

“She’s your girlfriend,” Laura answered brusquely.

“Yeah I know that,” Carmilla told her in an irritated tone, “I don’t need you to keep reminding me!”

It was as if they were going over the same thing over and over again and not getting anywhere, and it was starting to get very frustrating, especially for Laura. 

“Look, you said you came here to talk to me so please, say what you want to say and then go.”

“Cupcake, I’m trying to okay,” Carmilla said desperately.

Laura rolled her eyes. “Well can you speed it up a bit because I’m getting sick and tired of going over the same things over and over again with you”

Carmilla could sense that Laura was getting peevish and she could understand why. Every time the subject of their night together came up between them, they discussed it but never really said anything productive about it, it was anger venting if anything else. 

It seemed the only emotion Laura wanted to expel again right now was anger, whereas Carmilla was engaged in an inner battle within herself whether or not to emit the emotion that was swirling around inside her at that moment, and had been since the first day she had seen Laura again since that night in New York. 

Both were struggling to find the courage to come out and say what they really wanted to say, and the frustration that went with that was causing Laura to revert back to how she had been acting towards Carmilla for the past few weeks. 

With that in mind, Carmilla knew that she now had nothing to lose. “Do you ever think about it?”

“I’m not answering tha--”

“Please,” Carmilla interrupted pleadingly, “please.”

Laura quickly saw an opportunity here to find out the answer to a question that had been bugging her for weeks. “Only if you answer something for me,” she offered.

Carmilla swallowed the lump in her throat. “Go on.”

“Why her?” Laura asked sadly.

“What?” Carmilla asked in puzzlement.

“Elle?” Laura replied forlornly. “I know that she’s gorgeous and fun, and I love her to bits but still…why her and not me?”

Carmilla felt her stomach drop. “Laura…”

“What’s wrong with me?” Laura asked close to tears.

“There’s nothing wrong with you,” Carmilla told her strongly.

“Is that why you had to get away from me as quick as you could that morning in New York?” Laura pressed.

“That was about me,” Carmilla tried to explain. “Not you.”

Laura snorted; she didn’t know why she thought she’d get a straight answer from Carmilla. Carmilla had never really managed one yet. 

Laura closed her eyes briefly before glancing to the floor in order to mull over what she had been asked earlier, and to think of the best way to answer. 

She finally met Carmilla's eyes. “Look, I won’t lie to you,” she began softly, “I do still think about you and that night that we spent together in New York, but I’m not prepared to keep discussing something with you that is no longer relevant to either of us.”

Carmilla's heart did flips at the admission but soon deflated at Laura’s ending statement, though, she wasn’t prepared to let it go. “It’s relevant to me.”

“See, you’re doing it again!” Laura said heatedly. “You’re in a relationship with my best friend, and you’re stood in my hotel room in the middle of the night asking me what I thought about a night of sex with you, which by the way happened over a year ago! Don’t you get how fucked up that is?!”

“Laura --”

“When are you going to get that this is wrong?!” Laura cried, “that we shouldn’t even be talking about it!”

Carmilla held her hands up as if to protect herself from audacity. “Cupcake hang on, weren’t you not even a minute ago asking me ‘why your best friend and not you?’ or is that allowed in your world?”

“That is completely different!”

“and whys that?!” Carmilla asked in incredulity.

“Because it just…is!” Laura cried feebly, pausing for several moments until her tone dropped to a whisper. “It just is.” 

Carmilla remained silent as Laura threw her hands up in frustration and turned away from her. 

Laura wiped away some of the tears that were now beginning to fall from her eyes, and shook her head in desolation. She had no idea what to do anymore and suddenly felt tired and weak, like she had no energy to fight any longer with her sensitive nature. 

“You know, I’ve always blamed others for the things that go wrong in my life, when maybe I should be facing up to the harsh reality that, I’m the problem.”

“What?” Carmilla asked, not quite believing what she was hearing. 

“I mean when all’s said and done it’s me that lets everyone treat me like a doormat, so maybe I deserve it,” Laura clarified.

Carmilla looked at over at her like she was crazy, and in that moment, she desperately wanted to take Laura in her arms and tell her that she would never let anything hurt her ever again. 

Laura appeared so sad and vulnerable, and Carmilla distinctly remembered Elle once telling her that her friend always took responsibility for everything regardless of whether or not it was her fault, even blaming herself for her ex-girlfriend Kara not staying faithful, and her mother leaving in the dead of night some 15 years ago. 

Carmilla was not about to let that happen in this scenario, she was the one who messed things up for them and would be dammed if she was going to let Laura shoulder the blame for her screw up. 

Carmilla shook her head determinedly. “Don’t say that.”

Laura turned around. “Then why am I the one that gets hurt all the time?” she asked miserably. 

Carmilla glanced away guilty, she knew she’d caused some of the said pain herself. 

It was then that she had to make a decision, for looking at Laura and the way that this whole situation was making her feel left Carmilla with a choice. She had to put it all on the line right here and now, or leave and forget about what happened between them for good. 

She decided it was now or never. 

“Look, I know this situation is bizarre, and timing…stinks, but we’re not doing anything wrong just by talking about it,” Carmilla told her softly. 

“No?” Laura questioned in low disbelief.

“No,” Carmilla said getting closer, her voice hoarse as their eyes locked. “I mean it’s not like I’m telling you that… no matter what I do lately I can’t stop thinking about you, or that I haven’t been able to form a coherent thought in my head since I saw you again.”

“Stop it,” Laura begged weakly, her will to resist vanishing more and more by the second.

But Carmilla kept going as she took another step closer, their bodies now touching. “But you’re right,” she commented huskily, “something is wrong. It’s wrong that I can’t even bear the thought of being intimate with Elle anymore because every time I try, all I can think about is how she’ll never feel as good to me as you once did.”

Laura’s lips bobbed up and down momentarily. “I-I-this isn’t right...”

Carmilla leaned in ever so slowly. “I can’t fight it anymore.”

Laura trembled, ashamed that she was feeling very much the same. “You’re my best friend’s girlfriend,” she whispered, reminding her yet again. 

Carmilla took a deep breath but remained unyielding. “I was yours first creampuff,” she reasoned throatily, their lips now so close to touching. 

Laura still didn’t move but her breathing had increased rapidly, her chest heaving up and down the vast proof. 

Carmilla inched closer, until Laura could feel her breath on her lips. 

With one last penetrating look, Carmilla finally closed her eyes and let her lips connect to Laura's. 

It was the softest and sweetest of kisses, both of them giving their consent with equal participation. 

It lingered lovingly until Carmilla felt brave enough to lean back and see if it had the desired effect.

She watched Laura’s face for any indication to continue but couldn’t figure out what she was seeing. Laura looked confused, happy, turned on but angry all at the same time. 

It was very extreme and unexpected and absolutely nothing could have prepared her for what came next.

Laura slapped her so hard that she thought she actually caught a glimpse of next week. 

Carmilla remained firm and watched as Laura’s breathing increased even more with anger, before incredibly shrugging off the smack she’d just got with a devilish grin. “I still want you cutie,” she smirked.

Just then, Laura saw a glimpse of the confident Carmilla that she had been unable to resist in New York, and was powerless against its clutches. 

She couldn’t stop herself from responding the way she had been so afraid to since she had seen her in the kitchen that uncomfortable morning, and there was really no point in trying.

Laura gave in and smashed through the number one code of friendship, by grabbing Carmilla's face in her hands and fusing their lips together with full force. 

Carmilla grinned into the kiss which instantly turned hot as she reached down and hoisted Laura into her arms, Laura’s legs immediately wrapping around her waist tightly, her hands clutching Carmilla's head to hers.

They both knew this wasn’t going to be like before. It wasn’t going to be slow and tender; it was going to be fast and intense. 

What had been building up for weeks was simply aching to get out, and it seemed now that nothing would stop it from escaping.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again I want to say thank you to each and every one of you! 
> 
> This chapter is not suitable for anyone under 18!

There was no getting away from it. 

What they were doing was wrong. Very wrong. But then why the hell did it feel so good?

When Carmilla kissed her the first thing Laura felt was elation, closely followed by overwhelming guilt. 

After initially being left breathless from Carmilla's connoisseur kiss, Elle’s face immediately flashed into her thoughts causing her to slap Carmilla harshly across the face out of disgust. 

The thought of her best friend’s inevitable pain, should Elle ever discover what had just happened made Laura feel woozy. 

But the worse thing was in knowing that she had kissed back, that she had wanted it just as much as Carmilla had. 

She could blame this whole thing on Carmilla as much as she wanted but in the end, she had to face up to the fact that she could no longer resist this either. 

The slap was a deplorable attempt to make Carmilla leave her alone, seeing as she couldn’t find the words to speak after that kiss. 

But afterwards as she heard the words ‘I still want you cutie’, Laura finally gave in. She crashed her lips to Carmilla’s and all ethics on her part were erased from her mind. 

The second Carmilla lifted her into her arms Laura was to be unreachable. 

Her heart had totally blocked out her brain and decided to communicate with her libido for a change in a hope that she would finally take some action, though her mind was constantly trying to get through to her sensible side. 

It was to no avail, though, for every time a glimmer of guilt almost made it through, Laura would feel Carmilla's fingers plunge even deeper inside making the thought disappear. 

If Laura was honest she had never experienced anything like this before. 

From the minute Carmilla had virtually thrown her down onto the bed, and hiked her dress up and over her head hurriedly, she had an idea of what was coming, but none of what to expect. 

The burning desire in Carmilla’s eyes was unmistakeable and Laura knew she wasn’t going to be made love to like she was in New York, she was going to be fucked instead, and it made her feel a little nervous.

It had never really happened in her two previous relationships. 

She and her first girlfriend Danny had clumsily learned of sex together and neither of them ever really thought to fully let go with one another. 

As for Kara, she was always telling Laura how much she wanted to liven up their sex life, complaining that it had become boring and predictable. 

She even went as far to say that Laura was frigid at one point, roughly two weeks before Laura caught her in bed with another woman. 

It wasn’t that Laura was a prude, it’s just that she never felt comfortable enough with either of them to fully let go in that way, something that confused her at times. 

She really thought that she had been in love on both occasions, but then questioned how she could have been. 

It also didn’t make sense that the night with Carmilla in New York had made her feel more intimate than any time she’d spent with her exes. 

It was strange, but with Carmilla Laura felt excited and safe, like she could do anything. 

With that in mind she let Carmilla fuck her as hard as she wanted, and Laura would forever be thankful that she did. 

It was as if Carmilla was determined to have her lips on every single inch of Laura's body at some point during this frantic marathon of rediscovery, and would not be satiated otherwise. 

The attention that was being lavished on Laura at that moment was making Laura’s mind spin into frenzy, but in a good way. 

The sensations shooting through her body from every kiss, every lick, every touch and every plunge was making it near enough impossible for her to catch her breath. 

Another loud moan was about to escape her throat, when Carmilla's tongue hit a particular delicate spot perfectly between Laura’s legs, causing her to almost scream out in ecstasy. 

She continued to writhe around on the bed in an attempt to deal with the sensations that were now beginning to take over her body. 

They had been at it for just over two hours and even though Carmilla was showing no signs of stopping, Laura didn’t know if she could last the pace any longer. 

That wasn’t to say that she wasn’t enjoying it, she’d never known it so good if she was being honest, but she didn’t see how she could possibly physically orgasm any more that night without actually passing out. 

Glimpsing down at Carmilla, she saw that she was intent on proving her wrong. 

She reached down and gripped clumps of dark hair into her small hand, clutching to it as her eyes rolled into the back of her head. 

Laura was afraid to moan anymore; afraid as to whether or not she’d have a voice box left come morning if she did. 

She had never been so responsive while in bed with someone before and she’d certainly never been as vocal. 

It was as if she was discovering a wild side to herself that nobody knew existed including her. It was new, it was exciting and it was Carmilla that brought it out of her. 

A heavenly smile appeared on Laura’s face. 

Her body was now twitching from its latest release; the magical feelings flowing through her accompanied by the knowledge that Carmilla was finally there, with her, making her want to squeal in passion. 

She tensed up in concentration as the orgasm shot through her determined not to make any more noise for fear of losing her ability to talk, and then fought to get her breath back. 

Sometime later after her heart beat returned to normal, she looked down to see Carmilla watching from her stomach, a playful frown on her face. 

“What?” Laura asked, happy that the larynges in her throat were still allowing her to speak.

Carmilla didn’t answer straightaway; instead she begun administering gentle kisses on Laurs’s stomach, and slowly worked her way up her body. 

She couldn’t resist stopping for a couple of minutes though, on her journey to Laura’s lips. 

The soft mound was far too appealing and the nipple in the middle was just aching for attention. 

Carmilla teased it lightly with her teeth for a few moments before finally taking it between her lips, a hand suddenly cupping the back of her head pressing her closer encouragingly. 

She stay there for a while and then moved upwards once again, leaving featherlike kisses on Laura’s shoulder, chest and neck. 

The mood had now rapidly changed from a few minutes ago. What was fast and extreme, was now loving and tender.

Carmilla slid her hands under Laura’s shoulders, leant up on her forearms and hovered above the woman who was now firmly imprinted on her heart. 

She smiled when she felt hands immediately reach up and cup the back of her head. 

Gazing into her eyes, she leant down and kissed Laura’s lips gently.

Laura returned it and then smiled. “What was with the face before?”

“Cuppcake, I like it when you’re noisy,” Carmilla replied with a grin. “Why’d you stop cutie?”

“Medical reasons,” Laura chuckled.

Carmilla raised her eyebrows. “I could have made you moan some more if I wanted to you know?”

“I’m sure you could have,” Laura agreed giddily. “Though, you’re looking mighty pleased with yourself already.”

Carmilla laughed. “Should I be pleased with myself creampuff?” she asked referring to her ‘performance’.

Laura rolled her eyes playfully and shook her head with a smile. “I’d say so.”

Carmilla kissed her shoulder sweetly. “Do I make the category for best…you know?”

Laura pretended to look thoughtful, Carmilla was the best she’d had but she wasn’t about to inflate her confidence anymore, no matter how much Carmilla had to have known it already. 

“If you were, I’d never tell you.”

Carmilla frowned good-humouredly. “Why?”

“Because we are going have to leave this hotel room at some point, and we won’t be able to do that if your head won’t fit out the door,” Laura joked.

Carmilla didn’t take offence, she was glad Laura still was happy enough to joke. 

Carmilla was aware that what she and Laura were doing right now wasn’t exactly real. 

Yes, they were both happy in that moment, but sooner or later they would have to deal with the problems that they were inevitably going to have to face, namely Elle. 

Carmilla now knew that Laura was the one she wanted to be with, she knew all along if she was being honest, but she didn’t know whether Laura wanted the same thing. 

For now, though, Carmilla was happy to block out the world for a while especially if Laura was willing to do the same for the time being. 

“Be nice though wouldn’t it?” Carmilla mused.

“What?”

“Just to stay here in this room and shut everything out for as long as we want,” Carmilla replied.

“I know what you mean,” Laura said quietly. “I wish everything in life could be that simple too.”

Carmilla slowly got off of Laura and slipped to the side of her. “It’s not though is it?” she said softly.

Laura let out a breath. “Never is.”

Leaning up on her arm with her face against her cheek, Carmilla continued to gaze down into Laura's eyes, which were desperately trying not to shut. 

Laura was doing her best to stay awake but her eyelids were failing to oblige her. 

Carmilla watched as Laura’s eyes closed gently, only to see them rapidly open again moments later. Her brows furrowed in confusion, it was as if Laura was afraid of nodding off. 

It didn’t take too long for Carmilla to piece together in her mind why this was, Laura obviously thought that if she fell asleep first like last time, there was a chance that she’d wake up alone again.

“Cupcake, go to sleep,” Carmilla said softly.

“I’m okay,” Laura insisted quietly.

“Laura, I’ll be here when you wake up,” Carmilla assured her sweetly.

Laura blushed; slightly embarrassed that she’d been so easy to read. “Promise?” she whispered.

“I promise,” Carmilla smiled, before leaning down and kissing her tenderly. 

Laura beamed back and finally allowed her eyes to close, minutes later and she was fast asleep. 

Carmilla still watched over her in fascination for some time, until she herself nestled down against her and joined her in her sleep. 

****

The next morning Carmilla was the first to wake up. 

Sometime in the night Laura had turned on her side and snuggled right into Carmilla's chest, Carmilla’s arms wrapped around her protectively, and her chin resting atop of Laura’s head. 

Carmilla yawned quietly but resisted the urge to stretch; instead she tilted her head back carefully and observed the cute scene within her arms. 

Laura was still sleeping like a baby without a care in the world. 

Carmilla beamed as she thought about how lucky she felt in that moment, the smile getting bigger when she felt Laura try and get even closer to her. 

She continued to watch, desperate for Laura to open her eyes, though she didn’t have the heart to wake her herself. 

It had never interested her before when she had woken up to other women as she didn’t care about them enough to think about how they’d feel if she left them like that. 

The first thought that ever entered her mind was ‘how do I get out of this room without waking them?’ 

It had also been what she had thought the morning she‘d woke up next to Laura in New York, though, that had been for very different reasons. 

That particular morning she was scared of how her soul had reacted, and her first instinct was to run like she always did. 

But not anymore. 

Carmilla was eager for Laura to wake up because she couldn’t wait to see what she would say. 

But the strange thing was that it didn’t necessarily have to be anything interesting, she just wanted to hear her voice because of how soothing it was and how happy it made her feel. 

Carmilla knew that Laura was one of the nicest people she had ever met, even though others would probably say that they barely knew each other, she just knew. 

Laura had a charisma about her that instantly made you feel at ease, that you could be yourself and fully understood and Carmilla was fascinated by that. 

As a partner in a well-respected Law Firm it was hard not to become over confident with yourself, but Carmilla never wanted it to be seen as arrogant like some clearly did, she found it part of her playful nature and Laura seemed to find it funny. 

There was a mutual magnetism between them that neither could deny, they were able to have fantastic sex which even blew Carmilla away to some extent what with her thinking that she had seen and felt it all, and something else that just kept getting stronger and stronger every second they were together. 

Carmilla felt some movement against her and saw Laura's eyelids slowly begin to flicker open. 

After her eyes adjusted to the light in the room and she saw that Carmilla was still there with her arms wrapped around her warmly, the smile on Laura’s face was adorable. She was elated that Carmilla had kept her promise and not left her.

Carmilla grinned and leaned in towards her lips, pausing briefly before touching them with her own. 

“So this is what you look like the very first thing in the morning,” she commented, before kissing her sweetly.

“Mmm,” Laura cooed against Carmilla's lips. 

Carmilla pulled back a little. “I like it.”

Laura reached up and smoothed Carmilla’s cheek. “You’re still here.”

“I’m still here,” Carmilla spoke softly. “Just like I promised I would be.”

Laura bit her lip and snuggled even further into Carmilla's embrace, the arms surrounding her closing tighter. “That’s the best sleep I’ve had in weeks,” she stated.

“For me aswelll,” Carmilla added, as one of her hands started playing with the blonde’s locks. “Though got to say I was a bit worn out last night.”

Laura giggled. “Yeah you were worked very hard.”

Carmilla pinched her playfully. “It was just what I needed.”

“What you needed,” Laura remarked quietly; the last time she’d had sex was with Carmilla in New York...a year ago. If anyone needed a release provided by someone other than herself it was her. 

“You felt incredible last night cupcake,” Carmilla mentioned contented. “Better than I remembered.”

Laura lifted her head out of Carmilla's chest and looked into her eyes. “So you think about that night then.”

Carmilla closed her eyes briefly and smiled, “Only everyday of my life.”

Laura gazed at Carmilla in what appeared to be wonder. “How is it that you’re able to make me feel like this?”

“Like what cutie?”

“Like I’m the only person in your world,” Laura replied gently.

Carmilla looked thoughtful for a moment before slowly rolling Laura onto her back and climbing on top of her. 

“Because you are the only one in my world right now,” she told her softly, before kissing tenderly. 

The kiss soon became passionate and Laura was already gripping Carmilla's shoulders when her mobile phone started ringing from the bedside table. 

“No way,” Laura grunted, not amused at being disturbed at such a time.

“Leave it,” Carmilla advised hoarsely, before burying her head in Laura's neck.

Laura seemed to have listened and started planting kisses on the side of Carmilla's head before suddenly reaching out for her mobile. 

“I’m sorry but it might be important.”

Carmilla simply kept sucking on Laura's neck, not at all put off by something as trivial as conversation appeared at that moment. 

She was in the process of getting turned on and really wanted to make love to Laura this morning after what was a wild night the night before, but froze instantly when Laura greeted the caller.

“Elle,” Laura squeaked, clutching Carmilla’s head tightly feeling right away uncomfortable. “Are you okay?” 

Carmilla finally lifted her head up but stayed on top of Laura where she could watch her reactions closely. 

“W-w-what’s wrong?” Laura asked into her phone, she waited for the answer and colour soon started to drain from her face. “Well, when did she leave?” 

Laura again waited for the reply, as Carmilla quickly worked out that the conversation was about her. “Oh don’t say that, I’m… sure it was nothing you did.” 

Carmilla closed her eyes and rolled to the side breathing out loudly. She flung a forearm across her head and had to face the fact that their little bubble of happiness had just been burst harshly. 

She felt awful that she had hurt Elle, but she couldn’t stay away from Laura. It was as simple as that.

Carmilla worriedly looked over to the blonde who was now sat up clutching a sheet to her chest with one hand, and her mobile with the other. 

“Look Elle, everything will work out I’m sure. ’I’ll talk to you later okay. Love you too, bye.” Laura hung up and placed the mobile on the bedside table. She then went rigid. 

“Laura?” Carmilla spoke in concern.

But Laura wouldn’t look at her. “What kind of a person am I?” she asked in a whisper, the full implications of what she and Carmilla had done, just that moment starting to set in.

“Someone who deserves to be happy,” Carmilla replied.

“No matter who gets hurt?” she asked in disgust, and then finally made eye contact with Carmilla. “That would make me like you,” she said bitingly.

Carmilla laughed bitterly. “What you hate me again now, is that it?”

“I want you to go,” Laura told her miserably.

Carmilla rubbed her face with both hands and then shook her head vigorously. “No chance.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey you wonderful people, hope you are all having as great a weekend as I am.
> 
> This chapter picks up exactly where we left of
> 
> Hope you enjoy x

Laura got out of bed and reached for the hotel towel robe that she had draped over a nearby chair the day before. 

She put it on and tied it at the waist before turning to face Carmilla. 

Carmilla was still in bed, leaning up on one arm and bracing herself for an onslaught of expletives, only they never came. 

“I can’t think properly while you’re here,” Laura said calmly, “so I’d really appreciate it if you’d just leave.”

“I can’t,” Carmilla told her plainly.

“Why can’t you?” Laura asked, an impatient edge creeping into her tone.

“Because I know that if I walk out that door now, I’ll never see you again,” Carmilla answered, sounding scared of the thought alone. 

“Well maybe that’d be for the best,” Laura offered quietly, though she didn’t seem to be convinced by her own statement.

“Best for who?” Carmilla asked softly.

“For all of three of us,” Laura replied weakly.

“I’m not leaving you again,” Carmilla said defiantly.

“I’m not giving you a choice,” Laura said ruthlessly, though inside it was killing her to say those words.

“So then what was that last night?” Carmilla asked gesturing to the bed.

“Nothing.”

“Nothing?” Carmilla repeated in disbelief, “God, how good a fuck would it have been if it was something then?!” 

“You can be as crude as you want, it isn’t going change how I feel,” Laura insisted.

“How do you feel?”

“It doesn’t matter how I feel,” Laura replied, avoiding the question. “It only matters what we’ve done, why can’t you understand that?!”

“Well, I’m not buying it cupcake,” Carmilla told her firmly. “You were fine before that call, happy in fact, and I might add ready to go at it again.”

Laura blushed; she had been ready to get lost in Carmilla again and was extremely disappointed when her phone started ringing. 

Only when she heard Elle's voice on the other end did the full overtone of what she and Carmilla had done the night before and through the early hours of the morning hit her like a ton of bricks, and her mood changed rapidly. 

She wanted Carmilla more than anything, but she knew that she had betrayed her best friend. 

The conflict within her was unbearable and she had no idea how to handle it. “That call bought me back to reality.”

“Laura, that call made you feel guilty and I understand that!” Carmilla argued. “I’m not saying it’s going to be easy but, we can do this.”

“Do what?!” Laura exclaimed. “I mean how do you think this is going work exactly? “

“I’ll end it okay” Carmilla told her softly.

“And then what?”

“Well…she’ll get over it, and it’s not like she’d have to know about us straight away,” Carmilla replied. 

“God, have you heard yourself?!” Laura scoffed. “Elle may be a lot of things okay but one thing she’s not and that’s stupid. Do really think that she isn’t going find it odd when a few months after you break up with her, you start sleeping with me?!” 

She watched as Carmilla looked down and continued. 

“So can you see why this can’t happen? Elle would never forgive me, not that I blame her, and I just can’t do that to her.”

Carmilla closed her eyes briefly and pinched the bridge of her nose. “And what about me?” she queried almost vulnerably.

“What about you?” Laura asked softly, her heart breaking at the brunette’s poignant face. 

“I thought …I thought you wanted to be with me,” Carmilla said roughly.

“I don’t even know you,” Laura told her pointedly, “and yet you’re here expecting me to give up on a friendship that has seen me through some of the hardest times in my life and for what, two nights of sex?”

Carmilla had never really understood it when people said ‘it took the wind out of me’ until right then. 

Did Laura really believe that she didn’t know Carmilla, or that Carmilla was expecting her to turn her back on Elle? “Don’t say that,” she implored softly.

“But it’s true.”

“It’s more than that and you know it,” Carmilla stated firmly, her confident side somehow returning.

“No, I don’t!” Laura defended. “You wouldn’t believe the amount of times that I’ve put my trust in something with my heart whole heart, only to discover that it was all lies! Why the hell should I believe that you’re going be any different?!” 

Carmilla knew there and then what this was really all about. 

Laura wasn’t just terrified of losing Elle as her friend; she was terrified of losing her heart to someone again. 

Carmilla may have been a little more understanding of her plight, if she hadn’t been so wound up by Laura’s reluctance to accept that there was something between them that meant more than sex.

Carmilla scrunched her face up and snorted. “You don’t have to play the martyr with me Laura, okay? I’m not Kara” she told her with emphasis.

Carmilla regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth; she had meant what she’d said, but Laura wasn’t aware that she knew about Kara, or what she’d done to her.

Laura narrowed her eyes. “What did you just say?”

Carmilla cleared her throat. “I just … I just don’t think you should be prepared to take the blame for everything that goes wrong, that’s all.”

“How did you know about Kara?” Laura asked dangerously.

“It just…came up.”

“How did you know?” Laura repeated angrily.

“I don’t know… it was just one night when me and Elle were in be--,” 

Carmilla grimaced and stopped herself from finishing that particular word, but Laura already knew what she was going to say which only made her look even more furious. 

“We were just talking, and it came up that’s all,” Carmilla finished.

“And just when did my love life become so important, that the two of you felt the need to discuss it behind my back while in bed together none the less?!” Laura questioned lividly.

“I asked her,” Carmilla admitted.

Laura shook her head in revulsion. “Who the hell do you think you are?”

“My curiosity got the better of me okay? Anyway I don’t see what the big deal is, I know, so what.”

“The big deal is that it’s none of your business!” Laura exclaimed.

“You’re my business,” Carmilla said serenely.

“Oh no,” Laura disagreed offended, “I am not your business, as you so eloquently put it.” She walked up to Carmilla and jabbed her finger at her. “Elle is your business, or have you forgotten about her again already?”

Carmilla didn’t move but kept incredibly composed. “If you’re going to slap me again I just want you to know something okay? It’s getting really old, it doesn’t hurt, and all it does is make me want you even more.”

“You really have no remorse for what we’ve done, do you?” Laura asked in disappointment.

Carmilla took a deep breath and thought very carefully about how to word what she wanted to say next. 

“Laura, Elle is a really nice girl and I don’t want to hurt her any more than you do, but I can’t stay with her out of pity. It’s you I want and I know you want the same, you’re just too afraid to admit it.”

“Are you done?” Laura croaked.

“No,” Carmilla replied, getting closer to her. “You said you don’t know me, but I seem to know you. I know that Elle is your best friend, that it’s killing you inside to know that you’ve contributed to something that is going to cause her pain, and that the only way you can deal with it is to weigh yourself down with guilt. I know that you’ve got this annoying habit of always taking the blame for things that aren’t your fault, and that you’re the kind of person that will always put other’s happiness before your own.”

Tears were beginning to form in Laura's eyes, she couldn’t argue with a thing that was being said in Carmilla's gentle tone as all of it was true. “Please stop…” she sniffed.

But Carmilla continued. “Laura, when I saw you in the kitchen that morning for the first time since New York, I knew you and me were going to happen. It was never a question of ‘if’ but ‘when’. To be honest I’m stunned we lasted as long as we did.”

“It doesn’t make it right,” Laura reasoned.

“It doesn’t make the circumstances right,” Carmilla corrected. “Laura, you can try and push me away as much as you want but I know that you wouldn’t have gone to bed with me last night knowing what it could do to Elle, if you didn’t think we were worth it.”

Laura wiped some tears from her cheeks, realising that Carmilla already knew her a lot more than most. 

Their relationship, fling, thing or whatever one wanted to call it was not the usual love story. 

Even though they had only really gotten to know a little about each other in the past few weeks, they had given away so much more simply by being around the other, which was in soul mate territory. 

They never expected anyone to understand it, they were sure they’d never be able to explain it, but it was there somehow. 

Laura at long last let the walls that she’d built up around her heart after Kara come down, and finally let someone else in. 

It was new, much stronger, and there was more at stake than ever, but as she gazed into Carmilla’s eyes she knew. 

A flicker of excitement went through her with a little shot of apprehension as she finally came to appreciate that Carmilla was it. 

The real deal. 

The one.

They were two words that she had never associated with anyone before, not even Kara. 

Laura had thought that she was in love with her ex, after which of course she accepted she wasn’t, but Laura never felt the way she felt right now, looking into a pair of dark eyes, which had strangely enough just become more gorgeous.

She had to tell Carmilla some truths. “I’m scared,” she admitted softly.

Carmilla half smiled when she noticed the mood turned more manageable. “So am I.”

“Didn’t think you were afraid of anything,” Laura said quietly.

“Not usually cupcake,” Carmilla declared. “All my adult life, I’ve distanced myself from things and people that could become too significant to me with time…seeing as how it’s possible they won’t be there when I need them most.” 

As a youngster Carmilla was scared of life and its tribulations, especially when her dad had died from cancer, leaving her in the care of her stepmother, but throughout her adult life, that experience had made her feel as though she could walk through fire at times. But it also made her completely close off to anything and everything that could perhaps end up hurting her, until she met the woman in front of her. 

But now that she was again in a position where she could possibly lose someone whom had become incredibly important, it was terrifying her. 

“What changed?” Laura enquired curiously, still wiping away tears.

“I met you,” she answered simply. “Laura, after that night we spent together in New York, I was so afraid that I was going end up loving you eventually,” she admitted with her heart in her throat, “that’s the main reason I left the way I did.”

“And now?” Laura breathlessly encouraged her to continue.

Carmilla slowly cupped Laura’s face in her hands and stroked her cheeks with her thumbs, wiping away the remaining flickers of wet. “And now that I love you…I’m just so afraid to lose you.” 

Laura’s breath hitched in her throat. 

Just as she had admitted to herself that she was in love, her beloved was telling her that same thing. 

Fate had been hard at work, especially when it came to these two. 

Carmilla was still waiting for any kind of response and got more and more nervous every additional second of silence. 

She cleared her throat and licked her lips. 

“Look, I know this is sudden and I’m probably freaking you out right now but, for the first time in my life I actually want to pour my heart out to someone. I really believe that meeting you was fate, Laura. Falling in love with you was something I had no control over and for once, I’m glad about that.”

Laura was rooted to the spot and still couldn’t find her voice; she couldn’t believe this was actually happening. Carmilla was in love, with her. 

Her mouth was bobbing up and down when a small sound finally escaped. “I-I…I love you too,” she whispered.

For a few moments Carmilla stayed as still as a statue as she soaked up the elation that was now spreading fast throughout her body. 

She soon smiled widely, rested her forehead against Laura’s, and then gave her the softest, sweetest kiss that Laura had ever known. 

It lasted a few seconds before Carmilla pulled away to rest her head on the side of Laura's, hugging Laura to her tightly.

“I’m going make you so happy cutie” Carmilla pledged.

Laura breathed in Carmilla's scent and cooed happily. “Don’t leave me again, you hear me?”

Carmilla just hugged her tighter. “I promise.”

*****

An hour later and Carmilla and Laura were lying on the bed together half clothed. 

Carmilla was on her back while Laura was snuggled into her side, a leg draped over Carmilla’s thighs.

“Look, I can get the logic,” Carmilla said, idly playing with the Laura’s hair, “but why are we doing this again?”

“Because it’s important to me,” Laura replied gazing up at her.

“But we’ve already sinned so to speak,” Carmilla said lamely.

“But it was still wrong,” Laura argued. “And it will always be wrong as long as…you’re with Elle.” 

Carmilla frowned and Laura’s heart dropped. “I’m not trying to make you feel bad Carm, I just… please, for me?”

“I guess so,” Carmilla gave in, kissing her forehead. 

“Just think how much more special it’ll make it,” Laura mused dreamily.

“I’ve heard it’s even better when you know you’re in love,” Carmilla grinned.

“That’ll be interesting,” Laura pondered, blushing at the mere thought. 

How was it possible for their physical intimacy to get even better than it was? 

“Yeah,” Carmilla blew out, a comfortable silence hanging over them for the next few minutes.

Laura put her head on Carmilla's chest and listened to her heartbeat, feeling completely content for the first time in her life. 

She was still so ashamed of the hurt that this situation was going to cause Elle, but she couldn’t give up the person she felt closer to than she had anyone else before. 

She was madly in love with someone who was madly in love with her in return, and she had never before experienced the overwhelming feeling of protection and care that Carmilla immediately oozed when they became a couple. 

It was incredibly endearing and she never would have guessed that she craved it as much as she did. 

“I’ve never felt this safe before,” she commented softly, “If that makes sense?”

“It does,” Carmilla said in understanding, she felt exactly the same way. “So this is what it feels like,” she mused.

Laura looked up at her. “What?”

“Being in love,” she replied softly.

Laura just smiled, kissed her chin and then settled down on her chest again. 

*****

Sometime later and both girls were up and about. 

Laura was packing up her bag while Carmilla had just gotten dressed again after having a shower. 

Carmilla put on her boots and leather pants and went over to where Laura was neatly placing her red dress into her travel case. 

“Please say I’ll get to see you in that again soon cupcake?” Carmilla smirked from behind. She wrapped her arms around Laura's waist and leant her chin on the Laura’s shoulder.

“Someday,” Laura replied teasingly, before angling her head and pecking Carmilla's cheek. 

She continued packing as Carmilla began nuzzling her neck affectionately, a tickling sensation making her giggle softly. 

Her face suddenly went sombre, though, as a serious thought entered her mind. “Carm?” she voiced quietly.

“Mmm,” Carmilla hummed against her neck, trailing soft kisses on every visible area of skin.

“When are you going to talk to Elle?”

Carmilla stopped exactly where she was with her lips against Laura’s neck, before slowly raising her head. “Soon, I promise.”

Laura just nodded and carried on packing. Carmilla frowned at Laura’s reaction and gently turned her around to face her. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Laura smiled unconvincingly.

Carmilla chuckled apprehensively. “What did I say wrong?”

“You didn’t say anything wrong,” Laura croaked. “You didn’t, it’s just…you’re really sure this is what you want?”

“Oh creampuff, you know it is,” Carmilla assured her, before cupping the side of her face comfortingly. 

Laura relaxed a little. “So then…how soon?”

Carmilla took a deep breath and smiled. “Today soon.”

“You think I’m being funny don’t you?” Laura asked feeling stupid.

“No, no of course not,” Carmilla told her kindly,” I don’t even know why I said that. I’ll talk to her today.”

“I don’t want you to think I’m being pushy, it’s just that when I see her she’s going to be expecting me to put her mind at rest and tell her that everything’s going work out between you two,” Laura quickly explained. “And I can’t do that knowing full well what will be coming next.”

Carmilla caressed her shoulders and then kissed her gently. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me cupcake, I understand all that.” 

Laura looked at her gratefully; she knew this situation was going to be hard enough as it was without making anything else even more complicated. “Thanks.”

“In fact, there’s no time like the present,” Carmilla commented. She walked over to a chair where she had placed her jacket and put it on. 

“You mean you’re going to do it right now?” Laura asked in surprise.

“I think it’s for the best,” Carmilla said approaching her. “The sooner I finish it, the sooner I can concentrate on you and me. Okay?”

“Okay,” Laura beamed cutely.

“Okay,” Carmilla echoed warmly, before leaning in and kissing her tenderly. “I’ll call you later.” Carmilla gave her one more heart warming smile and left.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I say this every time but thank you so very much for every single one of you who have taken the time to read, leave love and comment. You are all amazing people
> 
> So the penultimate chapter carries on from the previous chapter
> 
> Buckle up creampuffs!

Laura stayed in the hotel room until checkout time which was 12 noon and then had dinner in the restaurant with some of her colleagues. 

She was glad when one of the girls made the suggestion as it was a perfect excuse to stay away from the apartment she shared with Elle for just that little bit longer. 

Hopefully by the time she got home, Carmilla would have already broken up with Elle, and she’d just have to put an arm around her friend and tell her that someone else would come along. 

It was going to make her feel shitty, that much she knew; for the simple reason that she was half responsible for her friend’s impending misery. 

After dinner Laura went straight home. She stood at the front door of the apartment and looked at her watch. 

She worked out that she had last seen Carmilla over four hours ago, so she surely had to have broken up with Elle by now. 

She took a deep breath and put her key into the door. 

Upon entering the flat she put her suitcase to one side and hung up her jacket, before cautiously heading into the living room. When she saw no sign of Elle, she headed for the kitchen. 

She got to the doorway and froze. 

There in the kitchen stood Elle and Carmilla. 

Laura’s mouth nearly hit the floor as did Carmilla's, when she saw her love standing in the doorway. 

Elle, whose back was to Laura, turned around when she noticed she didn’t have her girlfriend’s attention any more, and smiled at her roommate.

“Hey,” she said brightly, not acting at all like someone should when they’d just been dumped.

“Hey,” Laura squeaked, before quickly glancing at Carmilla, who just shook her head signalling ‘no’ to Laura’s clear question.

“How come you’re back so late?” Elle asked.

Laura smiled as best as she could. “Just…some of the girls wanted to have dinner so…”

“Oh Cool,” Elle beamed, happy that her friend was getting out and about again. “So, did you have a good night last night?”

The smile on Laura's face went rigid, while Carmilla tried to figure out where to put her face. “Ehh…yeah it was…good.”

“Well you look like you had a good time,” Elle observed.

“What do you mean?” Laura asked nervously.

“You just got that sparkle back in your eyes,” her friend said kindly.

Laura blushed and folded her arms. “Oh.”

“Well, I’m just going to run to the bathroom” Elle excused herself, and then started to head out of the kitchen. “Kettle’s on babe,” she added before leaving Carmilla and Laura alone.

Laura waited until her roommate was out of ear shot and then walked up to Carmilla with widened eyes. “What’s going on?” she whispered harshly.

“I only got here five minutes ago,” Carmilla replied.

“You left me over four hours ago and you led me to believe that you were coming here straight away,” Laura reminded her.

“I did come here straight away,” Carmilla told her quickly, “but she wasn’t in and when I phoned her she told me she was in town and to come back round about now.”

“Why didn’t you just call me and tell me that she wasn’t in?” Laura asked in a hushed tone. “At least then I would have known what to expect.”

“I wanted to okay” Carmilla told her just as quietly. “But when I took my phone out, it suddenly occurred to me that I don’t have your god forsaken number!”

“Arghh,” Laura groaned in frustration. “Well what are we going to do now?”

“What do you mean what are we going to do?” Carmilla asked confused. “I’m going to break up with her.”

“Well what are you going to say?” Laura croaked.

“Look, I’m just going to tell her the truth.”

“About us?” Laura asked sceptically. 

Carmilla shook her head. “No, I’m just going to tell her that it’s over,” she explained. 

Laura was about to say something when she heard footsteps from the hall. She almost jumped away from Carmilla and tried to act natural when Elle reappeared. 

“Coffee’s all around then?” Elle asked walking over to the kettle.

“Not for me thanks,” Laura replied quickly as she wrung her hands together. “Think I’ll just leave you two to it.”

Laura then hurriedly left the kitchen leaving Elle alone with Carmilla.

Elle chuckled at Laura’s nutty behaviour. “Would love to know what’s got into her.”

“Don’t think you would,” Carmilla mumbled under her breath.

Elle didn’t hear. “Sorry?”

“Nothing,” Carmilla said dismissively. “Listen Elle the reason I needed to see you, is that I really need to talk you about something.”

“That sounds ominous,” Elle smiled bravely.

Carmilla licked her lips. “The thing is…this,” she gestured between them, “won’t work.”

Elle had an idea of what was coming, but her heart broke now knowing it was definite. “I don’t understand. I thought that we were….that we were happy.”

“Elle…”

“I mean I know that you’ve had a lot of pressure lately what with work and stuff, and that we’ve not exactly been intimate for a while but, we can get past that can’t we?” Elle enquired hopefully.

Carmilla took a deep breath and looked Elle in the eyes. “There’s someone else.”

Elle's heart plummeted, but she soon felt rage starting to creep in. “What?”

“I’m sorry,” Carmilla replied quietly.

“So you’ve been cheating on me?” Elle probed with narrowed eyes, her tone now worlds away from the sweet sound that Carmilla was used to. 

“No, it… it just happened once. I tried to stop myself but I just couldn’t. I’m sorry,” Carmilla apologised again softly. 

Elle's lips pursed into a thin line and her nostrils started to flare, she picked up a glass tumbler from the side and threw it forcefully in Carmilla’s direction, but Carmilla was lucky enough to have such great, almost cat like, reflexes and was able to duck just in time leaving the glass to smash into the wall behind her.

Carmilla stared at her in shock. “Are you out of your fucking mind?! That could have hit me!”

“It was meant to hit you!” Elle yelled.

Laura suddenly appeared looking concerned. “What was that?”

“Ask her!” Elle told her angrily.

“Everything’s fine,” Carmilla said calmly.

“Everything is not fine!” Elle differed hotly. “She’s been screwing someone else behind my back!”

Laura stood there not knowing what to say, while Carmilla struggled with the same problem.

“So how long has it been going on?” Elle asked a bit more calmly, but her anger was unmistakeable. 

“I told you it happened once,” Carmilla replied.

“Well I think you’re full of shit!” Elle shot back. “If you wanted to fuck someone else couldn’t you have at least had the decency to end it with me first?!

“El--” Carmilla started but was cut off.

“When?!” Elle demanded.

“When what?” Carmilla asked.

“When did you do it?!” Elle spat.

Laura’s eyes were constantly moving between the two of them, the tension getting thicker by the second.

“It doesn’t matter,” Carmilla replied.

“It matters to me!”

Carmilla sighed. “Fine, it was last night.”

Elle stared at her like she was dirt. “So you left me alone last night, leaving me to worry about what the hell I’d done to make you run off so quick, just so that you could crawl into someone else bed?!”

Carmilla remained silent and Elle glanced at her friend to find some much needed comfort, but it was at that exact moment that Laura’s eyes met Carmilla's briefly, and a look of guilt could be seen for a fleeting moment. 

Elle looked between the two of them, the anger inside her boiling. “What was that?” she asked frighteningly calm.

“What?” Carmilla almost shrugged.

“That look she just gave you,” she replied flatly referring to Laura.

Laura froze but Carmilla played it cool. “What look? She just looked at me, there was no look.”

Elle wasn’t convinced and looked intently at Laura, whose lip was now quivering slightly. 

“I’m sorry,” Laura whispered, confirming her friend’s suspicion.

“What are you apologising for?” Carmilla asked trying to keep up the charade.

Laura looked at Carmilla and shook her head. “No,” she said quietly, signalling that the jig was up.

The silence that then followed lasted for at least half a minute, and it was almost unbearable. 

Elle swallowed hard and looked between the two of them in revulsion. “There is no way that this is happening,” she whispered deadly. 

She then stared at Laura like a stranger. “You of all people knows what this feels like, how could you do this to me?”

Laura felt terrible, she did know what it felt like to be cheated on, and she had helped someone do it to her best friend. “Elle--”

“You knew how I felt about her!” Elle exclaimed. “And all along you were going behind my back!”

“That’s not true,” Laura argued, “I swear it only happened last night.”

“Do you really expect me to believe that?!” Elle yelled.

“It’s the truth,” Carmilla contributed.

“Oh that’s sweet,” Elle mocked, “sticking up for your girlfriend are we!” She then turned to Laura. “Was there even a work function last night, or was it all just a lie in order for you two to meet up for a seedy little fuck?”

Laura was about to reply until Carmilla beat her to it. “It wasn’t her fault, I went to the hotel so if you want to blame anyone, blame me.”

“I do blame you,” Elle said hotly, before looking at Laura again with hatred. “But it seems that this one was only too happy to take her clothes off for you which makes her a slut in my eyes!”

“That is enough!” Carmilla told her warningly. 

She knew Elle had a right to be upset but she’d be damned if she was going to let anyone talk about Laura like that. 

Laura didn’t even flinch as she thought she was getting what she deserved. “Elle, the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, you have to believe that.”

“You don’t even believe that yourself, otherwise you wouldn’t have done it,” Elle commented more disappointed than angry, “I’m supposed to be your best friend.”

“You are,” Laura said desperately. “It just--”

“I mean did I even cross your mind at all?” Elle cut her off.

“Of course you did,” Laura replied.

“When?” Elle pressed. “Before? After? While you were doing it?”

“All of it,” Laura answered.

“But it didn’t stop you?” Elle queried in disgust.

“No,” Laura confirmed painfully, “No, it didn’t stop me.”

Elle shook her head in aversion. She couldn’t believe that this was happening. 

Carmilla licked her lips. “We tried to fight it, but in the end it was just... too strong.”

Elle glared at Carmilla. 

“You tried to fight it? You’ve known each other for a few weeks, what could have possibly been there for you to fight?!” she cried in frustration. 

She then saw them ‘look’ at each other again. “Oh for the love of god will you stop that?” she pleaded. “Stop trying to sneak glances at each other because it’s starting to make me feel sick! If you’ve got something else to say to me, just come out and say it!”

Laura wiped her lips. “We met in New York.”

Elle’s features scrunched up. “You met in New York?”

“When I went there with work last year,” Laura elaborated. 

“The trip where you came back like you’d just been to a war zone?” Elle reminded her harshly.

Carmilla’s heart felt heavy as she was reminded of just how much she had hurt Laura. She was just relieved that she was going to get her chance to make it up to her though they had to get through this first.

“We met there and things just…happened,” Laura told her.

“So by that, you mean you slept together?” Elle guessed.

“Yes,” Laura nodded. “I didn’t tell you because I’d never done that kind of thing before and…I felt stupid when it didn’t work out the way…it doesn’t even matter.”

“Looks like you’re doing a lot of things that you wouldn’t usually do nowadays Laura,” Elle said icily, “like cheating.”

“We never thought we’d see each other again,” Laura ignored her remark.

“And yet you stood in this very kitchen and let me ‘introduce’ the two of you?” Elle seethed. “It didn’t occur to either of you to be honest from the start and tell me what had happened between you? I bet you had a right laugh at my expense.”

“No, it wasn’t like that,” Laura told her desperately. “What happened in New York, it didn’t exactly end on good terms and when we seen each other again, we decided that it would be best to just keep it where it was, in the past.”

“But it didn’t stay there,” Elle commented rigidly.

“I never thought that we’d fall in l--” Laura stopped herself and looked at the floor.

“What?” Elle sniggered acidly , “Are you two going to tell me you’re in love now?” she sneered.

“We are,” Carmilla spoke firmly.

“No,” Elle disagreed nastily, “you’re pathetic, the both of you.” 

She glared at Laura but pointed at Carmilla. “She will do exactly the same to you, as she did to me. As for you,” Elle snorted, “you’re clearly just as stupid as you were the day you found Kara giving it good to another woman. You deserve everything you get.”

The tears were now trailing down Laura’s face. She took everything Elle threw at her, but inside she was hurting immensely. 

She began thinking, was she really that horrid a person that someone could say such things to her, and get enjoyment from it while doing it? She knew she had hurt Elle but she didn’t anticipate such spiteful words being aimed at her. But then, how else could she have had expected Elle to react? 

Carmilla went and stood in front of Laura and faced Elle, clearly having heard enough. “I think you’ve made your point, don’t you?”

“I haven’t even started with you,” Elle scoffed. 

“Look, you and I both know that Laura hasn’t got an evil bone in her body,” Carmilla started strongly, “we know that we’ve hurt you but that’s no reason to be such an evil bitch to her. I was the one who kept pushing okay, so if you want to blame anyone for this mess, blame it all on me.”

“She knew that you were my girlfriend,” Elle argued.

“I was never yours,” Carmilla told her firmly. “I was always hers.”

“Oh spare me,” Elle huffed. “You’ll get bored of her soon enough. The sex life you’ll get with her isn’t anywhere near as exciting as the one you’ve become accustomed to I can tell you that much now.” 

Carmilla snorted. “I’ve been there before remember, most recently last night. I’ve got nothing to worry about.”

Laura tugged on Carmilla’s arm. “Please, just stop,” she requested softly.

Carmilla gazed into Laura’s eyes and could see the sadness there. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“So sweet,” Elle ridiculed, earning a glare from Carmilla. She then glowered at the Laura. “I’m going out for a couple of hours and when I come back, I want you out of this apartment, do you understand?”

Laura just nodded despondently, while Carmilla wanted to punch Elle’s lights out for making her girl cry. 

Elle gave them one last fierce look, and walked out in a huff.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now for the final chapter.... hope you all enjoy!

Carmilla immediately took Laura into her arms and let her girlfriend sob within them. 

She planted kisses on her head affectionately as she attempted to soothe her, rubbing her back tenderly in order to provide comfort. “It’s ok cupcake,” she whispered gently. “Everything’s going to be ok.”

“What am I going to do?” Laura cried into her shoulder.

“You’re coming home with me,” Carmilla said simply.

“I can’t put you out like that,” Laura wept.

Carmilla eased her head back and smoothed her cheeks with her fingers. “What are you talking about? You’re my girlfriend and I want to take care of you,” she said tenderly. “Please, let me take care of you cutie.”

Laura sniffed. “But I can’t just--”

“Sweetheart, we can sort things out more clearly tomorrow okay? For now, let’s just get you packed up with essentials and get you out of here.”

“Okay,” Laura agreed, then wiped at Carmilla’s top. “Oh no, look what I’ve done you to your top” she said tearfully. It was covered in wet patches. 

“Don’t worry about that,” Carmilla said kindly, kissing her forehead. “Come on let’s get you sorted.”

*****

About an hour later they arrived at the Carmillas’s rented apartment. 

Laura was instantly amazed by the size of it, she was sure that the apartment she’d just been thrown out of would fit in it at least three times.

“So will this do you for tonight cupcake?” Carmilla nudged playfully.

“I think I can live with it,” Laura half smiled, still upset from earlier events.

“Why don’t you make yourself at home cutie, and I’ll get us a drink okay?” Carmilla suggested warmly.

“Okay” Laura nodded.

Carmilla didn’t move and continued to observe Laura’s expressions. She could tell that Laura was hurting immensely inside and just wished she could make it all go away. 

She cupped her face gently and gave her a sympathetic smile. “Everything will be alright you know?”

“Will it?” Laura asked unconvincingly.

“Of course it will,” Carmilla replied determinedly. “I know it doesn’t seem that way now but everything will work itself out, and Elle won’t stay mad at you forever.”

“I wouldn’t count on it,” Laura voiced sounding totally depressed.

Carmilla realised that nothing she could say right now was going to make anything better at that moment, so changed the subject temporarily. “Alright well, you go make yourself comfortable, I’ve just got to go call my office to let them know I’ll be here a little while longer.”

Carmilla smiled and then kissed her softly, before walking off into another room leaving Laura with a new feeling of dread. 

Carmilla lived in Toronto, whereas she lived in Ottawa. How were they going to work that one out?

****

Later that night, Laura was lying on the huge sofa that was in the middle of Carmilla’s rented apartment, while her girlfriend was sat at a nearby desk typing manically on a laptop. 

Laura was looking at the television blankly, not really taking any notice of what was on, a daze expression on her face. 

All she could think about were the events of the day and what was going to happen now in her life. 

When she left the apartment she had shared with Elle, she didn’t stop to think about the relationship she was now in, until it hit her when entering Carmilla’s ‘rented’ apartment. 

Laura lived in Ottawa, her life was there, but her new girlfriend resided in Toronto. The same thing kept playing in Laura’s mind over and over again, and it was distressing her deeply. 

She heard Carmilla's laptop close followed by footsteps. 

Moments later and Carmilla was crouched down in front of her. “How you feeling sweetheart?”

“Strange,” Laura relied quietly.

“Strange, in what way cutie?”

“I mean its weird feeling so happy and yet so diffident at the same time.”

“Elle will come around,” Carmilla assured, not knowing that Laura was now worrying about something different.

“It’s not Elle,” Laura shook her head.

“Well then what?” Carmilla asked confused. 

When Laura broke eye contact, Carmilla got up and crawled over Laura to sandwich herself behind her girlfriend and the back of the sofa. She draped her arm over Laura’s waist and leant up on her elbow. “Talk to me.”

Laura turned so that she was on her back and looking up into Carmilla's eyes. “Did you get in touch with your office okay?”

“Ehh…yeah but, I want to talk about what you’re so insecure about,” Carmilla replied seriously.

“We are,” Laura assured.

“I don’t understand,” Carmilla said innocently.

Laura smiled sadly. “When are you going to back to Toronto?”

It finally dawned on Carmilla. She rolled her eyes in realisation and breathed deeply. “I see.”

“I don’t mean to put a downer on things,” Laura said softly, “it’s just, if we’re serious about wanting a relationship then, I just want to know how you think this is going to work exactly?”

“I’ll commute,” Carmilla answered swiftly. 

Laura appreciated the suggestion, but she knew it wasn’t a viable option. “Carm, its over 250 miles away,” she commented sceptically.

Carmilla started stroking Laura’s arm affectionately, momentarily speechless. “Laura, I don’t know what to say right now.”

Laura just shrugged and put on a brave smile. “I’m sorry. We don’t have to talk about it now, it’s late and we’ve had a long day as it is right?”

“Yes,” Carmilla agreed hoarsely, still wondering how to answer Laura’s earlier question. 

She had an idea of how to solve the problem, but wasn’t sure how to even broach the subject it with Laura, for fear of making her question her sanity. 

The idea meant they would be moving fast, but Carmilla knew she wanted it, more than she’d ever wanted anything.

Laura’s voice bought her out of her reverie. “I think I’m ready for bed.”

“Okay” Carmilla acknowledged finally coming back to reality. “Look cupcake, I don’t want you to think I’m being presumptuous or anything but, when you say you think you’re ready for bed, do you mean my bed? Or spare room bed? Because you know, I don’t expect for us to share a bed just because we’re a couple or anything…i mean I totally respect you and--”

“Your bed,” Laura smiled, putting an end to her girlfriend’s rambling.

“Okay” Carmilla grinned, not saying another word.

The two got up off of the sofa and went to Carmilla's bedroom. 

After brushing their teeth and getting out of their clothes, they eventually settled into the generously sized bed and cuddled up together immediately. 

They were completely silent for a while, both just basking in being in each others arms, before Carmilla suddenly spoke. “Cupcake?”

“Yeah?”

“What you asked me earlier, I have an idea.”

Laura hugged Carmilla tighter to her. “We don’t have to talk about it now, really.”

“I want to.”

Laura smiled, but was still apprehensive at Carmilla’s nervous tone. “Okay.”

Carmilla closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “What if…what if you came with me?”

Laura looked into her eyes. “What?” she asked in huge surprise.

“I don’t want you to think that I don’t respect your life here or that you can walk away from it easily,” Carmilla said timidly, “but I had to ask.”

“I-I-I couldn’t do that?” Laura stuttered. “Where would I live?”

Carmilla scrunched her face up in confusion. “You don’t understand. I want you to come to Toronto…and move in with me.” Carmilla waited and waited for an answer, becoming more anxious the longer the moment passed in silence. “What do you say?”

Laura blinked rapidly. “Don’t you think that’s kind of fast?”

“We love each other right?” Carmilla asked ignoring hr question.

“Of course we do,” Laura replied, “but--”

“But what?” Carmilla interrupted with a smile. “Yeah, it may seem fast but, we’re not exactly setting an example of taking it slow are we?”

“What about my job?” Laura questioned still in shock.

“Wouldn’t you be able to get a transfer?” Carmilla suggested. “I see people doing it all the time.”

“You think it’s going to be just as easy as that?”

Carmilla shrugged. “Things are only as hard as you make them, Laura.” 

Laura looked down at Carmilla's comment as if she’d been scolded, and Carmilla suddenly felt bad for disregarding her girlfriends concerns. “They are good questions Laura and I have no idea how to respond to them, but I do know we can make this work if we try.”

“I’m not saying ‘no’,” Laura almost squeaked, “I just…” Laura trailed off.

“Look, you don’t need to answer now, I mean, its not like I’m going change my mind tomorrow,” Carmilla said reassuringly. “I’d wait forever if you asked me too.”

Laura looked her in the eye. “And what if I decided that there was no way I could leave Ottawa?” she asked.

Carmilla sighed dramatically and returned Laura’s gaze. “Then I’d have to start looking for a new place here I guess?”

Laura’s eyes widened in surprise, “You’d do that for me?”

“Laura, I'd do anything for you.”

Laura was still shocked that Carmilla was willing to drop her life in Toronto and find a place in Ottawa just to be close to her. 

She knew that this was going to be a risk; both of her relationships had failed and Carmilla had only been in one, one that Carmilla had ran away from as soon as it started to get serious. 

Laura was still trying to figure out why Carmilla thought that their relationship would be any different, and whether her new girlfriend would be able to handle commitment, but in the end she realised her mind was made up from the second Carmilla had asked her to move to Toronto. 

She was scared and that was the reason she was trying to look for excuses, when it reality, the only thing she needed to decide was whether or not Carmilla was worth the risk. 

Looking into Carmilla’s eyes, Laura knew there and then that she would never, ever love anybody the way she loved Carmilla. With that, her decision was made.

Laura smiled shyly. “Is your place big enough for the both of us?” she asked softly. 

Carmilla wanted to laugh, but instead just grinned. Laura was clearly going to have to get used to living like a princess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so there we have it, hope the last chapter wasn't a total disappointment. The purpose of the story was the journey they took in order to get together, and so I felt this was an appropriate place to leave it for the time being, I have some ideas for a potential sequel so keep your eyes peeled! 
> 
> Again, I fee like I am constantly repeating myself but I just want a big thank you to everyone who took the time to read, comment and leave some love! You guys honestly are wonderful people and you kept me totally inspired to keep writing as fast as I did!
> 
> AG17 x


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